Should I expose their cheating?

[Anonlost]

About 7 weeks ago my partner of 6 years told me that something had changed and that he didn't want to be with me anymore. We own a house together which I agreed to move out of temporarily while we sorted some things out. He promised me that he did not have anyone else and that he couldn't even begin to think about anybody else (along with a lot of other lies). 1 week later I found out he had a girl from work who is engaged staying at my house. I went mad and he denied it for as long as he could until he finally admitted it was her but swore they were only friends. Around a week ago I found out that she had left her fiancé and has been living in my home for several weeks. I am completely disgusted that he could have so little respect for me that he would move her into my house, I am still to take my things out of the property so she has been using all my belongings. It just seems sick. I am not so angry and disappointed and frustrated by the injustice of it all and the way in which i have found all this out one piece at a time that I feel an obligation to tell her fiancé what is going on. If my ex had told me the full story from the very beginning the healing process would have been much quicker and less traumatic and so I feel like I could help him to understand why she has called off their wedding. I also feel like it is infuriating that she is getting away with everything. On the other hand, I don't want to give my ex the satisfaction of painting me as the psycho ex. What shall I do? Does he deserve to know or am I doing it for the wrong reasons?

[parabola]

I would out the whole mess. The reason cheaters and liars get away with their stuff is because people don't want to be the one to expose the truth. Compromise and do it anonymously. They have a right to know, but who wants drama?

[JimBo90]

Hi, I'm sorry you are going through a tough time. I've been there.

Just walk away. You're all adults, it isn't fair to drag innocent bystanders into the equation for your own revenge. There's no such thing as a naughty corner in adulthood, nobody is going to fix it for either of you. That's up to you. If it can't be fixed, walk away. Imo, it's very immature to drag people into unnecessary drama. Personally, if it were me and I had to tell someone, I'd wait until asked what happened. Even then what's the point? You'll only be adding to the drama, making the situation even worse for yourself. Not to mention stooping to their level. Let people dig their own graves, everything eventually works out as it should anyway. It's not your job to take control in that department. You just need to take control of you.

I'd reccommend focussing on the things that can be changed, like moving forward and changing your future for the better. If you focus on things you can't change, you move backwards - you won't achieve a thing.

[hazey daisy]

Keep out of it, it's none of your business what transpired between her and her ex fiance. I know what happened to you is very painful and how he handled the whole thing was disrespectful. To be treated like that by someone you gave 6 years of your life too is despicable. I get that there is some kind of revenge on your mind to give back some of that hurt BUT why stoop to their level. Be the bigger person and cut your losses. It will eventually all come out without your help anyways. Her actions will destroy her relationships with family and friends. She took a huge risk, and she will pay for it in the end. It's very possible this relationship will fall flat on it's face anyways.

Gather up your friends/family and go over there to collect your things in one fell swoop. If there are financial ties to the relationship like the house, get a lawyer and settle it in court.

[melancholia]

You want to expose them because you're upset and bitter, and rightfully so. Everything you are feeling is perfectly normal and valid... but it is a terrible idea to get involved and cause more drama than there already is. Taking the high road and being as mature as you can, and leaving them to do their own thing is the best move you can make. It will only make you seem immature and dramatic, and it won't make you feel any better. Plus, if she left her fiance, then their relationship probably ended anyway.

I understand you are feeling a lot of hurt, anger, resentment and heartache right now, but you will recover from this. The sooner you collect your belongings and start focusing on your own life, the easier it will be to move forward.

Best of luck to you.

[thecatsmeow]

I am sorry your ex-boyfriend of 6 years did this to you. What he did was not only despicable to you but also to his new-girlfriend's ex-fiance. I hate when people do this. If you want to be with someone else go for it but to be in a relationship with one person and with another person at the same time is just cowardice.

You are better off girl, this man is not worth it.

If he can treat a person who he has been in a relationship for 6 years like this then that woman he was having an affair with deserves him.

I won't be surprised if it doesn't last...these things rarely ever do.

[verionicaspeaks]

Reading this gets me angry. I would be tempted to unleash but dont. You will regret it later because you will than be apart of drama instead of just moving on with your life.