What is this guy thinking?

[Becka1233]

I am a female in my mid twenties. Four months ago, I started physical therapy to help with some shoulder issues. I go twice a month. There is a guy who works there as an assistant, and since day one, I felt like he has been flirting with me. When I first started out, he would carry things out to my car for me ( things I didn't need help with), he would always go out of his way to talk with me, compliment my hair and clothes, and just always make eye contact. He also hugs me after every appointment.

I began to really like him as time went on. We always talk about stuff happening in life. I started wondering if I should give him my number or wait until our professional relationship was over ( which should be in about 2 weeks). However, two weeks ago we were talking about rock climbing and he mentioned that he had my number (I guess in the system?) and that we should go rock climbing together sometime. When he asked this, another assistant was standing right next to me so I felt a bit awkward about setting a time. So I just told him that it sounded like fun and he should let me know when he'd like to go. He gave me a hug and I left.

That was two weeks ago and he never contacted me. I had another appointment a few days ago and he never mentioned anything. He was still flirting with me and everything was normal. He mentioned that he had been busy, but that's the only thing he mentioned.

I don't understand why he would ask to hang out and not contact me? Do you think he is waiting until I'm done with physical therapy in two weeks? But then why not ask me then? I'm very confused at what he's thinking. Help!

[richiro]

this one is very simple. and a TON of people fall into this trap.
never make the mistake of believing the condut of anybody in the SERVICE industry or customer service industry is real or a sign of interest. why? because THEIR JOB is to talk to you, flirt with you, make your experience a good one, be nice to you, and act intersted in you. that's THEIR JOB! their pay and raises are determined by their performance and while not directly related to flirting with you... oftentimes performance is seen as better when they are personalbe and customers rave about them and send letters to their managers b/c they like them so much.

NEVER EVER overvalue good treatment from customer service personnel towards you. ITS THEIR JOB!

my guess is he was doing his job with you and it's all run of the mill small talk they have with eveybody during the course of the day at their jobs.

lesson [URL=http://www.loveforum.net/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2]#2[/URL] : NEVER look at words.. LOOK AT ACTIONS and BEHAVIOR. actions never lie. words are too easy to lie. his actions show there is nothing outside of work to explore here.

Sorry.

[melancholia]

He probably had been reprimanded for his inappropriate comment to you about meeting outside of work. It is very unprofessional for clients and employees to meet outside of the context of a professional engagement, because it creates a conflict of interest with the company. Hugging a client seems like a huge breach of appropriate behavior, as I have never hugged a client in my life and I've been in customer service for over 12 years.

Either he was flirting with you intentionally, but crossing the boundaries of what is acceptable employee/client behavior. Or, as richiro said, he was flirting because he thinks it is good customer service. I agree, you should never place much thought into how someone treats you when they work in any type of service industry.

[Kates David]

I`d kind of go with your first instinct. It sounds very much to me like that in dating a client he might sacrifice his job. I`d definitely have risked it, haha. He might just be a hollow worded ginormous flirt, but this suggestion of rock climbing is not a seductive one, and thus far he is definitely sounding like the real article to me. If you were my daughter, and by years you could be, I`d likely be quite enthusiastic. Another possibility, taking it he is a really good flirt, is that he is being paid to do it, or at least encouraged. Girls might be making more appointments on account of it. I would anticipate that being reprimanded over asking you out is statistically the most probable scenario. Turn it into humour, "I bet if you were to go climbing with me they`d shoot you stone dead" If the answer is yes he will definitely confirm it so, otherwise he does n`t even exist, he`s just a flirt, an exceptionally good one mind!! Perhaps he does stage work? This could account for it.

[Hooo!]

If you think he likes you your probably right. Although o would definitely give him the number privately so he can use it (which he definitely isn't supposed to if it's in the database)
Also you show interest which he then can be happy about