Is it normal to not want a hand job from my girlfriend?

[JamesBrimble]

I mean, like, if she asked, i guess i would say yeah. But i really dont have any intentions of asking or saying "can you give me a hand job" or "give me a handjob".

I kind of just want to give her the pleasure, i dont really mind not having as much.

[anachronistic]

no it's not 'normal' or average but that doesn't mean it's not wrong.

[vashti]

I have to ask: what are you doing? You are clearly not ready for sex, and yet you did it anyway, and now you are saying you don't even want handjobs. Why are you pushing yourself into something you clearly aren't ready for? there is nothing wrong with not being ready at 16; in fact, it is smart to avoid sex at your age. What's the story? Is your girlfriend pressuring you?

[Ath]

I never liked it too much... They were never as good at it as I was... lol

[Miss hotty]

i don't know what is more wired a guy who is not ready at 16 or a guy that don't want a hand job

[mr_fahrenheit]

No of course it's not weird.
Everyone is entitled to have different feelings, wants, desires, likes and dislikes.
Plus of course stuff like nerves and shyness can color these.

You never have to do anything you are not comfortable with, don't feel pushed into doing stuff.
If you don't want to or don't feel right, then don't do it.

On the other hand, perhaps it would feel wonderful.


Do you know WHY you don't want her to?
Or just have a feeling that you don't want her to?


Edit: ps. don't listen to silly insensitive comments like the post above. 16 is really young still, loads and loads of people are not ready or comfortable at 16.

[vashti]

Thank you Mr. Fahrenheit, I agree completely.

[vorguen]

i used to have sex with my ex sometimes just cuz she wanted to.. more of the idea "to please her" sometimes it wouldnt even feel that good. she seemed to over enjoy it having an orgasm every 5 mins. i guess it depends, i still wanted to have sex alot, i just didnt enjoy it that much... she was the horny one

[cuddlemonster]

no-one knows how to do a hand job, better than you! lol... er u know what i mean! lol

[Pris]

Your needs, desires and preferences will change about a million times while you're sexually active. At your age I was having sex just because I felt I should be. I didn't enjoy it that much and it was peer pressure that kept me doing it rather than any carnal desires. As for oral sex, I let my boyfriend do it but felt very detached and uncomfortable about it.

It wasn't until I was 18 that suddenly I realised what it was all about. And how completely fabulous oral sex was too! It is now my raison d'etre...

You'll change so much over the next few years, it may take you less or more time to start enjoying your girlfriend giving you a handjob, you may never enjoy it as much as other stuff, and maybe (just maybe) she's not actually very good at them yet? All men are different in how they like it done and she may not have got the hang of them yet. Don't assume it's always you that's in the wrong with this stuff!

Above all, STOP WORRYING! Sex is supposed to be fun, especially when you're exploring and deciding what you like and don't like, not some kind of exam on whether you're 'normal' or not (nobody is normal or abnormal, by the way, unless you count perverts and people who do illegal or painful stuff, so stop fretting!)

[bohemiandonut]

Why has James Brimble's post been last edited by Frasbee?

Anyway, girls suck at giving handjobs. Put it in her mouth.

[LostNotFound]

people be ready at different times. i think physically i am ready but emtionally- no way!! i would probably really be into it and then be a complete emotional wreck afterwards.

if your not ready your not ready. and if you push yourself or allow yourself to be pushed it'll suck.

no pun intended.

[Illusional]

the bottom line is... if she sucks at it then why would any guy want one??

raverboy