secrets

[selene]

Hello,

my situation:
im in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost 3 years. We have some friends together. One of our friends told my boyfriend to keep a secret. He wanted to tell him why another friend (a friend of all of us) dont want to talk to us (me and my bf) anymore. So its not like im not involved in that.
My question:
Should my boyfriend tell me that secret?

I would tell him, and i already did tell him some secrets because i trust him. I think its not ok that he dont want to tell me that kind of things. It would be no problem if i wouldnt be involved or would not know that person with secret.

Thank you for answers.

[vashti]

You shouldn't nag him into telling you secrets he agreed to keep, but he was an idiot for telling you he knew the secret.

[little pingoin]

Your word is nothing of your actions don't follow suit.

[Troubsey]

If it is something he feels you need to know he would tell you.

The man stays true to his word, thats a good thing. Telling you he knew the secret wasnt a smart move on his part.

[Illusional]

regardless of what you think, this bond is between your bf and your friend. 1 + 1 never equals 3.

raverboy

[Yggdrasil]

Haha, good try sugarpie. Trying to apply some reversed psychology there aren't you?

The answer is of course: NO.. he shouldn't tell you.

If he tells you, he's no longer trustworthy enough to entrusted with any secrets by you.. is he now?

[IndiReloaded]

Selene, grow up. He was asked to keep a confidence and you aren't invited to share the secret. Deal with it.

And stop being so insecure that you are somehow the reason for the not speaking.

High school drama. If you are out of high school, you should be embarrassed.

[selene]

thank you for your answers.

I wanted something more than just ''no'' or ''yes'' answers or something like that in 2 santences. I would like to explain myself also in more words but my english is not good enough for better words.

I still think he should have told me that secret, because none of you all could explain me in a smarter way why he shouldnt.

I think partners should tell each other everything, especially when both need to know something. And please dont act like you all are keeping every secret. Be fair atleast at this topic and think about that situation like its happening to you. Not like you are a perfect person who has to keep a secret for every price. Its good to keep it, and its morally correct, but not in any case. If you are smart (i think that you think you are) than you would not keep every secret for you.
And my question was not if its ok that he dont tell me that. My question refers to my situation - im involved in that. And if your problem is if its morally correct to keep it, ask yourself if its correct when he dont tell me why my friend dont want to talk with me anymor. I surly can deal with everything he could tell, but not with a secret my bf hides from me that involves me.

[little pingoin]

No, not everyone keeps every secret they're told. However, your boyfriend knows you and seems to believe that this is something that shouldn't be shared with you. Perhaps he believes it will unnecessarily hurt your feelings. Perhaps he doesn't trust your reaction to it.

If you want to know why this friend isn't talking to you, ask the friend. Your boyfriend really shouldn't be a part of that equation. If the friend won't tell you, let it go. Is it really worth damaging your relationship with your boyfriend over?

[vashti]

All you wanted to know is why your friend doesn't want to talk to you any more? That's easy: s/he doesn't like you. End of story.

[selene]

@little pingoin
Thank you little pingoin.
I tryed to ask the friend. No answer. I did let it go now.

@vashti
And thank you vashti for your useless post again. I dont realy need your arrogance. My friend doesent like me? Maybe true but that was not my question.
So please if you do answer here in my topic, post something smart and dont spam me with your useless posts.

[tooxshort]

Just because he is your boyfriend doesn't mean he has to tell you secrets he's gotten from other people. Secrets are meant to be kept confidential.

If you were to tell someone something that involved another person, would you automatically assume that the person is entitled to tell their significant other? Nope. At least I hope not. It would suck to tell my friend a secret about his girlfriend, he tells his girlfriend, and then she's obliged to tell her best friend, and so on.

Perhaps your boyfriend doesn't want to tell you because it has to do with you and like little pingoin said, it may hurt your feelings or open a can of worms.

[boobaa]

Hello,

my situation:
im in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost 3 years. We have some friends together. One of our friends told my boyfriend to keep a secret. He wanted to tell him why another friend (a friend of all of us) dont want to talk to us (me and my bf) anymore. So its not like im not involved in that.
My question:
Should my boyfriend tell me that secret?

I would tell him, and i already did tell him some secrets because i trust him. I think its not ok that he dont want to tell me that kind of things. It would be no problem if i wouldnt be involved or would not know that person with secret.

Thank you for answers.

Secret wouldn't be a secret if it wasn't secret, so simple is that. You are nosy.

[Only-virgins]

Hello,

my situation:
im in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost 3 years. We have some friends together. One of our friends told my boyfriend to keep a secret. He wanted to tell him why another friend (a friend of all of us) dont want to talk to us (me and my bf) anymore. So its not like im not involved in that.
My question:
Should my boyfriend tell me that secret?

I would tell him, and i already did tell him some secrets because i trust him. I think its not ok that he dont want to tell me that kind of things. It would be no problem if i wouldnt be involved or would not know that person with secret.

Thank you for answers.

I have special mind powers and will tell you the secret. The friend likes you and doesn't want to talk to you two because you two are now dating and it will piss him off. Vashti epic fail once again.

[tooxshort]

I have special mind powers and will tell you the secret. The friend likes you and doesn't want to talk to you two because you two are now dating and it will piss him off. Vashti epic fail once again.

Hhahaha ... what a jerk.