Heartbroken and Dumped, PLEASE HELP

[Layzie1207]

My girlfriend and I were going out for 3 years, and she loved me to death for a very long time. I was immature and took her for granted and treated her badly, and for a long time she wasn't happy in our relationship, but I did love her I just didnt know what it meant. My first week in college she called and said that she wanted to break up with me, and I couldnt take it at all. I refused to believe it was over and I fell desperately in love with her. I realized how much I loved her and how I realized that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. She always wanted me to feel this way about her and I finally did, but instead of seeing how much I loved her she truly didnt love me anymore. She said she had a revelation that she didnt love me in a relationship way anymore after a long time of waning feelings. I tried everything to get her to love me and showed her how much I loved her by doing everything I could, but she couldnt force herself to love me and now she wants me to move on. She wants me to not think that its going to happen with her and she wants me to move on from her, but she still wants to be best friends. I didnt realize that i was actually being dumped until about 2 months after this all started and everyday I would freak out and she was too scared to tell me the truth, and I just kept pushing her far away to the point where she is terrified of me. I realize now exactly what she wanted from the beginning which was for me to let go of her, but I really didnt believe she wanted that, I thought she wanted me to change into loving her, because she loved me like I love her now for a very long time, and I am having a hard time grasping why she doesnt want me now that I am the way she had always dreamed I'd be. I realize that if i ever have a chance with her again is that if I move on and am a whole person and healthy again, but I am having a very hard time moving on because I cant believe that I started loving her like this and now she doesnt want me to love her. She said that she wants to have an amazing friendship with me after I've moved on from her, but right now I only see myself moving on in order to get another chance at a relationship. I see myself saying to myself, 'ok, if you get better and become the friend that she wants and be her best friend in the entire world, and be her friend to be her friend, then its only a matter of time until she falls in love with you again." I keep thinking that but I also feel like im setting myself up, but I am heartbroken because I never got a chance to love her feeling this way and I hate myself for taking her for granted for so long. I also think about her loving me and our most intimate moments and her doing that with someone else and it just kills me, and I dont understand why she can't love me now that I am like this. But I know that I would have never changed into this person unless she did break up with me. Please help me sort out my feelings, because I dont know what to do and Im scared that the only way I am going to get better is to bank on the fact that if Im her best friend she will fall in love with me again. I want to move on, but I still want to move on in a way that I still want to be with her, while being ok not being with her.

[guy]

ok i didnt read all your story but once a girl wants to break up its over deal with it
it may be hard on ya but thats the way it is, face the truth that she is gone, she wont come back
and you should learn from this experience to grow up n treat your next gf better

[emokid18]

Well this same exact situation happened to me. this girl broke up with me and i triied being friends with her but she was like no i dont want to be friends anymore, well i left her alone for awhile...did my own thing and maybe its was 4 months later i called her out of the blue to catch up on things we started talking alot and became best friends...we dated again...she dumped me again...still we remained friends but i did not limit myself to just her just like she dated other guys. Her bf didnt like that she had a guy for a best friend and she dumped him. soon after we started dating again. this went on for three years. but when she dumped me the third time there was no hope for us to remain friends because the last time we dated we really hit it off and i just couldnt stand for that to happen again.

[Draven]

Well buddy, you're in college don't worry you'll find girls there.. you're too young to have a relationship that's ''that'' serious, look to go and have fun, get laid, play poker, just make sure you don't get that involved, because if you get hurt, it will screw you up badly in college.. my suggestion is live ur life bro! girls are evil at a young age

[emokid18]

i agree with Draven only it is too late for me.

[bluestrattos]

girls are evil at a young age

only at young age ?

About your situation Layzie, do an effort and forget her, you'll find another girl. But keep in mind, that the only things you can take for granted is taxes and death.

[King Zarathu]

exs are your ex for a reason--it means that she was NOT the person for you to spend the rest of your life with. everything happens for a reason bro. like ^ somebody said up there, live ur life. get laid, play poker, enjoy urself! do things that pass time quickly and find somebody else to help you get over that one chick..

poopie

[abercromqt20]

poopie?.....

[King Zarathu]

poopie!

*cough*

[abercromqt20]

ok just making sure...... *still confused*

[kanzaki]

i dun really get wat is in ur mind. All i know is break up and it's over