Help PLEASE!

[KJones]

So, my fiancee and I are getting married in six months. I have a few issues that are making me not able to trust her. Please provide me your insight.

There have been a few issues that I have discovered over the past 6 months or so that make me uneasy. One specifically - she has this one particular (one only) guy, who can't see her relationship status on facebook (shows that she is engaged) as well as pictures of her and I. He is specifically blocked from both. I confronted her on this and she said he was a guy that she used to like, but no longer did. That "she liked him in college, but he always had a bunch of girls and she no longer liked him". That they were just friends and occasionally text each other. She insisted that he knew we were engaged and kind of nervously laughed as if he were pissed or something. She said she would unblock him if I wanted her to, but I told her it was ok that I trusted her. I asked why he was blocked, and she said that he is weird about that stuff.

The weekend before her moving in with me (a year ago), she said she was going skiing with her girlfriend and informed me that she would be leaving on Saturday morning. That friday night I was chatting with her (via text) and she said she was at dinner with her girlfriend. I said to have fun and drive safe in the morning. She responded with ok, love you.

Last night, while gathering pictures for our slide show at the wedding, I ran across some pictures of this skiing trip. There were some pictures from that friday (could tell from time stamps on the photo's), when she was "out to dinner", of a group of them in a hotel room hanging out, this guy above was included in the pictures. And some from Saturday of the group on the slopes, guy also included.

Now, should I be concerned about this guy that she is "friends with" and is oddly blocked from facebook pictures and her relationship status. Secondly, what should I do about her telling me that she was leaving in the morning, but she was obviously there already?

I should also say, this was in NC and was the weekend before she moved (to florida) with me. I know nothing has happened since this, as she has been living here for a year.

Am I looking to far into this? Should I understand that she is here with me now and move on? How should I address this with her?

[sadie_genie]

As your intuition tells you, there is probably something going on. Don't get married until you are absolutely sure she is the one for you. Don't demand her to do anything because no one likes demands. But let her know about your boundaries and that you should be respected. If she can't respect you then you don't see yourself being with a person like this. If she doesn't show you that she is completely open about her relationship with you then leave but if she is willing to respect you then you take her. But she can do what she wants. Let her decide.

[Boisdevie]

So you are 6 months away from getting married and you're not sure about the relationship = don't get married. Try to sort out this problem before because if you don't your marriage will not work.

[VincenzoG91]

I agree, getting married will not fix a troubled relationship. Fix the trouble now or end the relationship without getting married, otherwise there will be unhappiness, fights and then legal fees. On a related note, having kids will not fix a troubled relationship either, just make everything more complicated.

[ammi00]

Personally, I believe you're reading too far into this. You have no real evidence that she cheated on you, but on the other side she can't prove she didn't do it, either - so everything's based on assumptions only. However, this isn't your biggest problem. Your biggest problem is the trust issues, and you definitely can't get married if you have them. They won't disappear in a snap of fingers, you have to solve them somehow. Any serious relationship, especially a marriage, won't work if it's not based on trust (at least so I think).

[KJones]

So, how do you recommend I address this with her? How should I approach it?

[girl68]

pre marriage counselling.

[KJones]

So, we spoke last night. She said he was just a friend and nothing happened. They did go skiing and they had two rooms, but didn't tell me because she didn't know how I was going to react. She expressed that she has had trouble explaining these things to me because of how I may react. Nonetheless, it was a lie and she fessed up (after me prying) that it was indeed a lie and apologized. She did say that that was the past and she is marrying me and to forget about it. She said that she broke ties with this person.

Further, we are going to start pre martial counseling stat.