Is this normal?

[sandyblythe]

Hi! I'm new on here, but I've really been looking for advice and I didn't know where to go, but this was the first site that popped up on google...

I'm 21, and I've been with my boyfriend for about a year and a half. He's waiting until marriage, but I'm not, and I've had sex in other relationships that I've been in. At first, it didn't really bother me. But now, I think about it more and more. However, as of recently, whenever I go out with my friends, if I am drinking, I always get a really strong urge to try to get with other guys. It's almost like I can't control myself. When I'm sober, I would never think about cheating on him, except for maybe with a hot, famous guy. But back to being serious, I just don't know what to do. I know that I'm trying to fill the void of a sexual relationship by talking to people when I'm drunk. I just don't know why I feel like it's okay as long as I'm drunk. Maybe it's just my mind trying to remind me that I'm young and that's what people do in college... You don't just settle down when you're still young, I guess. I just don't know if I should do anything. I mean, I always feel guilty after I do it, so it's not like I'm happy about the idea of possibly cheating on him. I haven't cheated on him yet, and I really hope I don't end up cheating on him. I really love him, he's the best person I've ever been with, and I can really see myself with him for even longer... He just makes me so happy. I'm just looking for a little advice on what to do.

Thanks!

[Jason250]

many thanks

[dem862]

Drinking impairs judgment. I venture to say, if you stop drinking, you may stop having these thoughts. If you continue to drink and have these thoughts, you may eventually act on it, which will probably ruin your relationship. So I ask you, what is more important? Your drinking or your relationship?

BTW, not everybody in college gets drunk and has sex with strangers. The purpose of college is to get an education and prepare yourself for the workforce. If you are hanging around with people who get drunk and have sex with strangers, you are only preparing yourself for a lifetime of drama and unhappiness. I hope you will examine your life and prioritize your values.