Help ! I need him to trust me

[Fairyworld]

So theres this guy who im madly in love with and he says he loves me too. We broke up due to me not being understanding of his needs, we began arguing alot towards the end... anyways

When we started dating he asked if i was talking to other people. Which i told him no. Ive moved country so all my old friends are in Uk. Sometimes people message me on facebook and everytime it was a guy I would tell him.

So one day he went thru my facebook messages, I didnt have a problem with this. Anways he found this one guy who i didnt tell him about (im sure i did but he said i didnt) he got upset .. it was a general convo with this guy but it came across i was flirting. (i didnt think i was. looking back it looks that way)

So recently he has come back to me after 2months of not being togehter, we were still in contact but we wasnt really talking much. He wants us to try again, which is progress, when i asked him before he refused me. So i left him, so his come to me.
He wants me to show him that he can trust me, he wnats me to convince him that im not going to do no wrong to him (he was cheated on before. previous relationship) i want to give him what he needs. I no he loves me and wants me in his life but his scared and i dont blame him.
Things were not easy for us as we live an hour apart from one another. Also i dont speak his parents language, which then makes it hard to get along with them, which then makes them ot think im good enough for there son and that i dont like them. WHich is not true.. but becuase we can not communicate they concluded to that.
I need some advise on what i can do to show him its going to be better and that he can trust me. We have been texting but its going no where cos its just words. We are meeting next week and his expecting me to give him something , show him. I dont no what. Ive been honest and open always with him and this one mistake has made him wonder if Im going to hurt him again.

[solarion]

If you're determined to make it work and he has trust/insecurity issues, then you're going to have to prove to him that you're worthy of his trust.

Frankly if I could honestly say I hadn't done anything wrong and I still wasn't trusted by my partner...I'd walk away. People with trust issues tend to be insecure and that isn't going to go away any time soon. When you say "it was a general convo with this guy but it came across i was flirting. (i didnt think i was. looking back it looks that way)" it sounds like you're either justifying his insecurities or you had a foot out the door. Facebook is filled with people that keep doors to their exes cracked open a peep so that they can walk through them quickly at the first sign of danger in their current relationship. Are you prepared to give up facebook connections to ease this guy's insecurities?

If you're serious about this guy and see a long term future with him, then begin to bridge the language barrier with his parents. You're the expatriate and should be the one to adapt.

[Fairyworld]

I'm learning the language as we speak. But it's not easy and especially when his parents just rule me out.

I've told him I would delete my Facebook but he don't want me to. He wants me to not just delete it he wants me to show him I won't be talking to people ? If that makes any sense

I need a way to show him

[solarion]

Well played. All you can do is bridge the communication gap with his folks, you cannot make them like you. Don't try...just be yourself. Then at least you won't be accused of being a suck up and you'll at least have a chance to earn their respect.

It doesn't make sense and sounds like he's rather controlling. I'd probably nuke fb anyway if it were me. Don't even leave that door to arguments open. You've a right to privacy too. Just because someone cheated on this guy in the past doesn't mean you should give up everything that's important to you. What's next...your phone?

If the actions you're taking aren't enough, then walk away. If you give up too much of yourself you'll come to resent him anyway and/or he'll take you for granted and lose respect for you.

[basilandthyme]

I strongly agree with Solarion's comments about not accepting a lack of trust if I have not been untrustworthy. Frankly, I can't imagine being OK with someone reading my FB conversations to make sure they can trust me. I would not be OK with reporting every conversation I had with a male friend. And DON'T kill your FB for him! It provides the link to all your old friends and they are important to you.

To be honest, I'd be turning this back on him. Something along the lines of "I have not flirted or cheated on you ever. I am not the person who hurt you and I will not accept this lack of trust created by someone in your past. If you can't trust me, then leave me"

Yes, I know my approach is brutal. But he's putting all this baggage on you due to no fault of your own. I think you need to tighten your own boundaries.