I don't really have much experience with relationships, so I'm really hoping that some of you might have some advice regarding my predicament. Sorry that this post is so long!
My girlfriend and I have been dating for about 4 months. We are together almost everyday, and we laugh, shower each other with attention, watch movies together...everything is going really well. Well, at least up until the last 2-3 weeks. Before I begin, let me preface this by saying that she used to be in a really abusive relationship, so she considers me to be the first 'good guy' that she's ever dated. She left the country to escape her abusive boyfriend, and only recently returned after spending 3 years in South Korea. And to top it off, she experienced horrific trauma when she was much younger -- she was raped when she was a young teenager.
But anyways, one day she really wanted to watch this movie that I couldn't stand, so I asked her if we could watch something else instead. She got really cold, distant, and pulled away (literally pulling away the covers) and basically gave me the silent treatment. I was trying to figure out what was really going wrong, but she wouldn't tell me. Then she started critiquing everything I did -- it was like I was always doing something wrong, whether it was forgetting to do something or never doing anything she likes to do. However, this couldn't be farther from the truth -- for instance, I watch her favorite movies all of the time, let her pick what take-out food to get, etc. Then she proceeded to tell me that the real reason she was upset is that her abusive ex-boyfriend would never let her do anything she wanted, so she would have to secretly do things like watch her favorite tv shows when he wasn't around. She said that she wasn't angry at me, and that none of this was my fault. She started crying a bit and I tried to console her, but she gave me the cold shoulder -- so eventually I just went to bed and hoped she would sleep it off. The next day it was like nothing had happened at all. She was back to being cheery and warm and full of love.
Things were good for a few days, so I thought it was just a one time thing -- but then it happened again. And this cycle keeps repeating. It causes me a lot of anxiety because I don't really know what she is thinking or what I can do to make things better. She said that she would work on her moodiness and go to a support group that she found, but she keeps putting it off. I really think that she needs to see an actual psychologist, but she makes excuses. What do you think about this? I really, really like her and want the relationship to work out.