This isn't like me but I need someone to talk too. I've been friends with a girl for over a year it was an onine thing we were only casual friends at 1st nothing serious then around November she was having relationship issues it was an ldr. And she started talking to me all the time and at 1st I just wanted to be a good friend, but I fell in love with her. I told her how I felt she didn't return that at 1st then about a month later she acknowledged that she had feelings for me. We agreed to give it a try and it was great at 1st it would have been an ldr as well she asked if I would come see her and I started planning the trip to canada, I'm in the u.s east coast. But it was going great then her ex came back and she just changed and then she broke my heart. For 2 months she didn't speak to me, she blamed me and hated me. And just as I finally started to deal with it. One night she just texted me me and then called me crying and apologizing asking if I hated her.the problem is don't hate her I should but I found the one woman in the world that just makes me happy being around it has now been made clear we will never be more than friends. But I love her I don't know what to do I want to talk to her and we do talk but I also try not to talk to her because of my feelings. I have promised to never pursue anything more than a friendship. I just can't deal with my emotions. This has never happened to me before. What DC o I do I feel like I need her in my life even if it will only ever be friends. But at the same time I feel I never should have responded to that text. I'm 35 years old and have never cried over anyone before but her I cry over and I can't control it. Any advice, should I cut her out of my life,should I keep her in it? I'm so lost, alone and afraid to ruin the friendship that I am trying to mend.