This girl has a boyfriend but keeps calling me?

[ammubition]

I am in college - I knew her as a freshman and really wanted a better chance to meet her which I didn't get until after she got a boyfriend. I really like her but it hurts too much to hang out with her because of it, so I've been trying to avoid her calls or not answering her calls/coming up with excuses -

I have told her to her face 5 times that I won't do things with her since she has a boyfriend, but she keeps on calling me! Recently she got her boyfriend to confront me and say "hey im ok with you hanging out with my girlfriend." Am I doing the right thing?? I don't think I have a choice and she needs to realize it.

[lovesjoyajm]

Wow, that is annoying - I'm sorry this girl is putting you through this! I'd say you need to just tell her one more time - you aren't interested in being her friend and you're done answering her calls. Then don't answer her calls.

[Pectabyte]

Sounds like your reading to much into things. Sometimes when a girl is nice she just wants to be friends.

[carl1222]

I'm trying to make sense out of why a girl would be so persistant in trying to be your friend to the point of having her boyfriend tell you he's OK with it. That's very wierd. If she just wants a friendship and you want more, then your choice was right ... stay away from her for your own peace of mind.

It's not clear from your post if she's looking for something more than a friendship ... something like a "friends with benefits" relationship. If so, then they may have an open relationship or are looking for a threesome.

Carl.

[lovesjoyajm]

Sounds like your reading to much into things. Sometimes when a girl is nice she just wants to be friends.

That is what he thinks, and he doesn't want to be friends with her because he has feelings for her.

As for what Carl said, if that's true (that they have an open relationship or something) I would stay even FARTHER the hell away. This girl has a boyfriend. Friends with benefits makes a tiny bit of sense to me if you want sex but haven't found a person you want to be with, but if this girl is in a relationship and still wants that friends benefits deal with you...what's wrong with her boyfriend? It would be one thing if you just wanted sex from her, but you like her. Don't get yourself into this mess because it sounds like this girl has problems with relationships on any level.

[Gigabitch]

Wow. Weird.

Avoid that girl.

[Pectabyte]

Avoid her boyfriend too...

[23mako]

I'll translate what the boyfriend meant: You pose no threat to him (he doesn't feel like you can steal his girlfriend from him). Also, he wants to be cool with you so you won't try stealing his girl behind his back. Also, she is in a relationship. She likes this guy and you probably don't have a shot with her unless she and her boyfriend start drifting apart.

[Carabiniere]

On a completely different note, from a guy's POV, it's very cool of you that you don't want to intervene with another guy's girl.

Having what would be considered a "hot" girlfriend is rough when every guy she meets tries to get into her pants regardless of the current situation. I can't begin to imagine the shit that's going on now that we recently broke up.

Kudos to you.

[ammubition]

ahhh I continue to stop hanging out with her but she still keeps on trying to do stuff with me even when I won't listen to her. Is it possible that she does like me she just isn't sure I return the favor and doesn't want to jeopardize her current relationship? That would be looking on the bright side but I feel like the best resolve is to talk to her, otherwise no one is going to feel better.

[carl1222]

ahhh I continue to stop hanging out with her but she still keeps on trying to do stuff with me even when I won't listen to her. Is it possible that she does like me she just isn't sure I return the favor and doesn't want to jeopardize her current relationship? That would be looking on the bright side but I feel like the best resolve is to talk to her, otherwise no one is going to feel better.

That's the bright side? That she may be trying to line you up as a replacement before dumping her boyfriend?? Why on earth would you want that?

Carl.