What the fcuk?!!!

[CocoChanel]

nobody else saw this? really?

Nobody else saw what?? I'm confused.

[IndiReloaded]

Legally she has always been my mother. When I was living with my mother... I took care of her 90% of the time anyway. When I moved out on my own... I pretty much begged my mother, let me take her with me. She said yes because since she was born and after her mother was buried I took full responsibility of raising her. My mom trusted me so she let me take her with me. I raised her as if she were my own. But I was too young when my best friend gave birth so... no I legally could not have not custody. It went to my mother. But as far as papers go... My mom is her legal guardian.

This explains things. Vash, you were right.

[CocoChanel]

Hrm.. Your guy sounds a bit like me. Sometimes I get mad at people for things I'm doing myself, like the way it's ok for him to come up from work grumpy, but it's not ok for you to do the same. If I was pissed/stressed, I'd expect my girl to support me -- even if that means leaving me alone -- but if she was pissed/stressed, I'd be thinking "What is this b*tches f***ing problem?!".

I also have a tendency to blame people for actions I'm doing myself. Like blaming my girl for not being affectionate enough, only to realize later that it's really been me that hasn't been very affectionate, and she in fact has been very affectionate. I read an article on Ego/Id a while back, and it said the things we hate about other people tend to be things we secretly hate about ourselves. I think that's related, as the things I'm blaming other people for could be things I'm subconsciously hating about myself.

For me this all comes from a selfish attitude, and I don't mean to be "emotionally abusive". Maybe it's because I was an only child, and I got everything I wanted without having to give back, or having to share. blah blah blah.. I dunno, I'm not a psychologist. I do know that once I recognized this behavior in myself, I've been able to stop it. So have you called your guy out on his double-standard BS? He may not be aware that he's doing it.

He is an only child as well and very spoiled. He admits that himself. I do call him out on his double-standards but he is so stubborn. In the past... the arguments would get so bad and he would just walk out. We didn't start arguing until around October of 2007 up until our 1st Break up in August of 2009. We got back together in November of this year. Before this.. our relationship was fine with little bumps but nothing we couldn't hurdle.

It seems like after he went away for a couple of months and came back... things got worse and we were full of anger towards each other. I was causing major problems and he was trying to fix them by being a controlling jerk. Now that he has been in therapy... he doesn't really argue with me... but he acts like he doesn't know how to communicate with me now. He's like a robot.

[CocoChanel]

This explains things. Vash, you were right.

You mean all this time you thought I had her LEGALLY? I'm only 24... no court would allow me to have her legally. It was by my mother's choice to let her live with me. She was cool with me raising her when I was living with her but when I moved out... she thought about it for a while. After 3 months when I came out the academy she agreed. But I had said some of this that in a thread a long time ago when Petit asked me about it and I explained the entire situation. This isn't nothing new.

[IndiReloaded]

You need to simplify your life. And get therapy. You are too young to consider marriage. Wait at least another 4-5 years. These issues will be resolved by then.

[CocoChanel]

You need to simplify your life. And get therapy. You are too young to consider marriage. Wait at least another 4-5 years. These issues will be resolved by then.

So right. You are so so so so so so so so right. I guess he did it for me by taking my engagement ring. I won't be taking it back. And I want to find another therapist/counselor whatever they are called. Because I don't feel comfortable with the man he sees.

[Petit Papillon]

Sorry but Your thread title remind me of this song (guy is singing there too if somebody is too unpatient ;P)
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qAI9lj-DIxc"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qAI9lj-DIxc[/ame]

[shheadz]

He's like a robot.

That's why I'd always be luke warm to the idea of counseling. It seems like people learn these very specific steps to avoid arguments, anger, etc.. But they forget how to express their true self. It seems to only get worse the longer someone is in counseling.

[Gigabitch]

Nothing you have ever posted about Anako has led me to believe that is is anything but a giant walking douchebag. Even when you're nice about him, I still read through the lines and conclude that he's a big, spoiled baby with no regard for you as a human being.

You can borrow my shovel if you want to bury him in the backyard.

[Junket]

Nothing you have ever posted about Anako has led me to believe that is is anything but a giant walking douchebag. Even when you're nice about him, I still read through the lines and conclude that he's a big, spoiled baby with no regard for you as a human being.

You can borrow my shovel if you want to bury him in the backyard.

Actually, how about you and me bury them both in the backyard?