Will he take me back?

[lhn]

Congratulations Luca. Really really happy for you and yes, you're with a very brave man. Taking someone back after that, he's followed his heart over his head, thats for sure.

Please don't do it again to him lol

[sookie6]

Fickle? Yes. Dishonest? No. I never lied to him. I actually told him from the beginning that I have a history of bailing on relationships after about a year. I told him that I don't want to get married, or have children as well. He knew that there was a chance this wouldn't be a long term thing. I also let him know as soon as I heard from the ex-ex that I was having doubts.

I have read through your thread with great interest. It is nice to see that some of us get to have a happy ending. Good for you girl!

I could not help but feeling a bit puzzled by what you said at the beginning of your relaionship. I hope that you are seeing things different now about a possible future with your bfriend. But why on earth would you make such extreme statements at the beginning of knowing someone?
This is called self-sabotage.
At the end of the day we are all looking for a stable and steady relationship with someone we know will be there for us through thick and thin.
By saying these things to your potential partner you probably mean to be honest about what kind of person you are. But you are not helping to build stable grounds in the relationship.

I am sure you know this and I don't mean to patronise. A relationship is not all about romantic dinners and mind-blowing sex it is also about being there for someone when they are ill, depressed, sometimes jobless. Most of us and guys also want to marry, have children with someone they can rely one.

It is very okay to feel insecure about your own ability to sustain a relationship but you need to take things as you go. Do not anticipate that you will bail out of the relationship at some point, or that you will never marry or have children...because you just don't know....

Trust yourself and your partner. Give it 100 % and now that he is back in your life and after the whole experience with the ex-ex make your partner feel special and loved. He needs to feel he is number one and that actually the whole confusion cleared the air...

I wish you the very best

[Gigabitch]

Hopefully, he sees this whole thing as something you just needed to get out of your system and now he can trust you, but it probably won't be that easy.

Luca, you're going to have to do some work to reestablish trust. Don't worry, it doesn't involve confrontation, you big chicken. Make sure you tell him every day how happy he makes you, how wonderful he is, something about how satisfied you are. Guys need to hear this stuff too. See that he does.

[Perryville]

Good luck to you, Luca, but remember that trust, once broken, is very difficult to restore. You may still have to come clean with him, so as long as you are truthful, you'll be OK.