2 loves 1 heart

[hunybuny]

Hi,

Im posting here because ive been talking to my closest friends about this situation and everyone tells me different things.
So now I would like to have more advice / opinions..

Im 20 years old.

Ive been with my bf for more than 2 years. We never fight, never argue, like the same things, do the same things. Still have good sex, still go out, still say i love you.

We dont see each other a lot though because we both have busy lifes.

I have to admit sometimes Im a bit bored, I would go out with friends when hes not with me and dance with other guys but nothing more.

Now I just met a new guy. Hes older than the men Ive dated. He really knows how to talk and how to act to turn me on.
He has a girlfriend since 1 month and he says it doenst go very well with her.
Weve seen each other only 3 times but he makes me feel like I known him forever and Im VERY attacted to him.

I was thinking about this situation and I thought that could be a sign its over with my actual boyfriend because if I really loved him maybe I wouldnt be paying attention to other men.
I also thought the new guy is probably a player who just wants to f*** a younger girl.

Then my boyfriend called me and we talked and I thought I cant leave this guy. hes so real and simple and sweet.

Then I thought about the new guy and the things he said and the things he did and I desire him a lot and feel like I want to see him again I dont want to lose him.

What do yu think am I just a stupid slut, is the new guy a moron, is it over with my actual boyfriend, ...what should I do?

[SelflessnHumble]

Hi,
Im 20 years old.

Your age means nothing.
Applied knowledge which can only come from experience means everything.

Ive been with my bf for more than 2 years. We never fight, never argue, like the same things, do the same things. Still have good sex, still go out, still say i love you.

When you say "Still" you make it sound as if it your relationship has been allowed to "drag on."
This says a lot about what is really going on. You are bored which only further reveals
your intentions: You don't love your BF.

I have to admit sometimes Im a bit bored, I would go out with friends when hes not with me and dance with other guys but nothing more.

This is a red flag. "Just" dancing with other guys? No eye contact at all?

Now I just met a new guy. Hes older than the men Ive dated. He really knows how to talk and how to act to turn me on.
He has a girlfriend since 1 month and he says it doenst go very well with her.
Weve seen each other only 3 times but he makes me feel like I known him forever and Im VERY attacted to him.

(1) YOU are in a committed relationship with your partner.
(2) In order for another man to "turn you on" he has to be invited into your life...So...

Both of you are in committed relationships YET you have no issue contributing to his cheating
and certainly have no issue short changing your current BF because you are too much of a coward
(via a matter comfort-ability and convenience) Both of which are ingenuously selfish and egotistical of you.

I was thinking about this situation and I thought that could be a sign its over with my actual boyfriend because if I really loved him maybe I wouldnt be paying attention to other men.

Then my boyfriend called me and we talked and I thought I cant leave this guy. hes so real and simple and sweet.

Then I thought about the new guy and the things he said and the things he did and I desire him a lot and feel like I want to see him again I dont want to lose him.

What do yu think am I just a stupid slut, is the new guy a moron, is it over with my actual boyfriend, ...what should I do?

Your low self esteem issues is ONE reason why you cheat on people.
You cheat yourself in the very same manner, only worse: you think it's ok to do so. This is not right nor fair to him.
Your priorities are all out of whack and you don't even love nor respect your current BF at ALL. (no, you don't)

Your relationship with your BF ended the moment you decided to allow another man into your life and bed.

It doesn't matter that your BF is so real, simple and sweet.
You need to stop acting like a self indulgent child and grow up: and here's how to take the first step:


-You sit your BF down and you tell him:

"I cannot be with you in this relationship anymore..."
"I can't explain exactly why I feel this way about you BUT I have feelings for another man
that I recently met and I don't want to go on being with you when I'm not giving you my all." -which HE deserves-
(as anyone does)


Stop allowing your emotions to control you and your life's decisions.
You made your bed: now sleep in it.

Stop lying to people. It just makes you wreak of a Coward.
Stop cheating people out of their happiness due to your own uncontrollable selfishenss.
This isn't love so do the right thing and tell him: and let him go so HE can find some women with
love, respect, patience understanding and integrity that you are seemingly devoid of based on your posts.

It's a New Year: MAKE THE CHANGE or you will continue to lie, cheat and steal indefinitely.

[hunybuny]

Thank you.