Laziness.

[Gratedwasabi]

Hello.

So, the biggest problem in my life is laziness. I'm really, really lazy. Unless something is very fun, I usually want to avoid doing it. My apartment is almost always a mess because, while I really like cleanliness, I just am too lazy to spend the 30 minutes a day cleaning.

I often mess around on the internet for hours instead of studying my career or reading or doing SOMETHING productive because it's easy and, while not really fun, relaxing to just waste time on the internet.

When I'm motivated, usually by work or by trying to impress a woman, I'm extremely unlazy. Any time there's a chance a woman is coming over I deep clean my apartment, organize, cook, etc.. but otherwise my apartment is a mess and I'm doing nothing.

Simple things like loading the dishwasher, doing laundry, taking out the trash, etc.. I just push back and back and back and avoid doing as much as possible. Even working out I try to push back/to a different day.

Any ideas for this? I'd really like to be a guy that comes home to a spotless apartment, makes some tea or a glass of wine, and reads a book instead of being a guy that comes home to a messy place, shrugs, makes coffee, and wastes 3 hours refreshing one of 5 pages on the internet.

And NOW I'm feeling down and thinking about starting a video game I used to be obsessed with again, which is a horrible idea.

Any advice? Medication or seeing someone about it is not an option (I don't have medical insurance so I absolutely can not afford any of that right now.)

[KingZ]

Oh, what's that? You're a standard male?

Prescription: 20mg of Adderall a day.

[Gratedwasabi]

Oh, what's that? You're a standard male?

Prescription: 20mg of Adderall a day.

Inorite? I don't want to be a standard male, though. Argh!

[MerryH]

I don't know, you just have to do these things. If this sounds like dumb advice, that's because it is dumb advice, but that's all there is to it. You just have to find ways to get off your ass and do shit.

I, too, am remarkably lazy so here are some things that help me:

- I'm sure you're familiar with this concept, but there's always the whole "Don't 'reward' yourself until you take care of things."
- Ex: Kitchen is a mess, but you're having more fun doing something else. Just clean one area. Clean the counter, go back to dicking around on the internet. Thirty minutes later, take out the trash, then back to dicking around. You can do this shit all day, you're unemployed.
- Get drunk and then clean. This makes it so much more fun. I find I can really get into it if I've had a few. Music helps.
- Uh, that's about all I got.

[vashti]

Make a list of what you want to get done, and as you DO them, cross them off. Don't allow yourself any lazy time until you do them. For some reason, a tangible list seems to motivate, and gives you a sense of accomplishment as you cross things off.

[Lipp]

- You could try to merge the two instead of dealing in extremes - e.g. browse the web and start streaming a movie or a tv episode, but rather than just sitting there you can get stuff done while paying moderate attention to the screen, makes it easier to do something productive while not having to put all the focus on something dull. At least that's what I do when I'm cooking quite a bit, which usually takes 1-2 hours or if I'm cleaning my room.

- The reward thing may work, I personally use it for expenditures (e.g. when I finished my exams and did a good job for 'em all I bought a new pair of shoes and headphones), but it may also work for home chores. I'd try to designate the day to get stuff done, and then the evenings to have fun, it gives you that 'get shit done' attitude in the morning and if you have fun in the evenings you'll eventually get sleepy to stop you from going overboard with how much time you've spent.

- Definitely not the case for everyone, but while I have a hard time to get started with cleaning as well I actually tend to find it therapeutic - in a "hey, the rest of my life might be a mess, but at least I can make this bathroom look mint! Yeah bitches!" kind of way.

- Wean yourself off the computer. Shut it down and pull the plug for a day and see what you get up to - does it make you bored or do you actually feel better doing other things?

[doppelgaenger]

i have one suggestion and one idea.

the suggestion is to hire a(n attracive) girl to come over and watch you clean and get your shit done.

the idea is to think of chores and stuff (which require no more than subconscious thoughts and reflexes and behavioral patterns) as an opportunity to meditate - read a book before doing a chore and then reflect on it while you're washing the dishes. i usually do my chores during study breaks or in the middle of a good book, or while taking a break from writing. really gets the cells moving.

Oh, what's that? You're a standard male?

Prescription: 20mg of Adderall a day.

is that what they give you for your issues? i think they should double your dosage.

[SelflessnHumble]

Hello.
I'm really, really lazy.

Any ideas for this? I'd really like to be a guy that comes home to a spotless apartment, makes some tea or a glass of wine, and reads a book instead of being a guy that comes home to a messy place, shrugs, makes coffee, and wastes 3 hours refreshing one of 5 pages on the internet.

And NOW I'm feeling down and thinking about starting a video game I used to be obsessed with again, which is a horrible idea.

Any advice? Medication or seeing someone about it is not an option (I don't have medical insurance so I absolutely can not afford any of that right now.)

This is the easiest thing to address: It all starts with you, but more to the point it starts with a thought.

(1) It starts at the subconscious level, whether or not you are aware of this...(hint)
(2) All you are doing is saying "Ah, F$%z! this sh*^!!! Then this thought propagates and permeates throughout your mind...
(3) Finally once this has happened: You manifest an action: Do nothing (inaction)

You are directly responsible for your "laziness" which is just another way of saying you simply choose
to not do what it is you "need" to do. -Avoiding responsibility-

Medication isn't needed.
You need to unplug the computer.
Take the Power Supply and put it away (far away)
Then need to write down the essential "To Do list" (not to procrastinate list)

Then you one by one DO IT! Until you have finished.
Then reward yourself with some internet time BUT keep a time limit.

If you don't adhere to this it just means you don't want to do it, and that is fine.
But then you can't complain or wonder why you aren't able to: It is simply because you chose not to.

Many people do this more than they choose to admit.
You've admitted that it is a problem.
Now you just have to solve it and the solution is right there ^^^

[doppelgaenger]

Thanks for the post, captain obvious - yes, the reason why people procrastinate is because they are acquainted with a task they don't want to do. The amount of work outweighs the benefits.

A really productive person views all tasks as short-term goals that will ultimately benefit him. He is self-motivated as a result and usually finds a way to enjoy what he is doing. Self discipline fits in when a person starts to stray away from his work. If you have to force yourself to do something by taking away the computer, that's kind of pathetic. I'm getting these ideas from Samuel Johnson and Ben Franklin. Age-old advice!

[sookie6]

I find that most people have a tendency to be lazy. We would all rather have fun than cleaning up.

What motivates me:

- the poor opinion of others if my place is untidy..yes I 'm that dependent on people's view on me. So I try to often have people over so that I maintain my place spotless.
- the list idea is excellent and I do have a little booklet by my bed where I write ths things that need doing every evening. I cross everything I've accomplished with the highlter..as the days go by...it's even fun...

However, when I think of the most tity people I know, they are usually the most uptight..people who loves 'spotless' usually have issues of control...I mean a phobia of losing control...so I do not envy them...If we think of a whole spectrum from being a slob to a control clean freak I'd rather tend towards the slob as it means a more laid back attitude.

[SelflessnHumble]

Thanks for the post, captain obvious - yes, the reason why people procrastinate is because they are acquainted with a task they don't want to do. The amount of work outweighs the benefits.

A really productive person views all tasks as short-term goals that will ultimately benefit him. He is self-motivated as a result and usually finds a way to enjoy what he is doing. Self discipline fits in when a person starts to stray away from his work. If you have to force yourself to do something by taking away the computer, that's kind of pathetic. I'm getting these ideas from Samuel Johnson and Ben Franklin. Age-old advice!

So...now you have to follow me around like a little dog on a leash just because you cannot take the very same criticisms
that you are more than willing to provide for others? Captain obvious? If I'm captain obvious are you Admiral Ignorance?

Wow, talk about an insecure boy, wow.
Get over it. People get their asses handed to them all the time.
Lesson learned. Here's something you haven't learned:

Ad homimem attacks (google it, I know)
and 3rd grade ridicule does not denote intelligence nor does it make
you look "cool" because you've managed to combine adjectives with adverbs in one sentence.

But hey, thank you very much for saying that my advice is "kind of pathetic."
Very mature and respectful of you.

[Lipp]

So...now you have to follow me around like a little dog on a leash just because you cannot take the very same criticisms
that you are more than willing to provide for others? Captain obvious? If I'm captain obvious are you Admiral Ignorance?

Wow, talk about an insecure boy, wow.
Get over it. People get their asses handed to them all the time.
Lesson learned. Here's something you haven't learned:

Ad homimem attacks (google it, I know)
and 3rd grade ridicule does not denote intelligence nor does it make
you look "cool" because you've managed to combine adjectives with adverbs in one sentence.

But hey, thank you very much for saying that my advice is "kind of pathetic."
Very mature and respectful of you.

Let me just attempt to explain the way it works on an (public) internet forum...
You give us the scenario and we give advice. If you don't wish to take it, fine.
Overlook what you don't accept or agree with.

Welcome to your own advice.

[Raze]

How exactly is this problematic? You seem like a typical guy to me.

[Gratedwasabi]

How exactly is this problematic? You seem like a typical guy to me.

I try not to fit within the parameters of a typical guy. I was that for a while and I didn't like it.

[Raze]

Okay, but you're ignoring my question. How exactly is this a problem?