How can I move on if I still like this girl?

[tomvd]

Hi everyone,
I'm just going to give the short version right

Like 5 years ago i got to know a girl in school. I didn't know her very well, I just got to know her because she always smiled at me when we passed by. I only had a drink once with her and for the rest i just said hi to her. After 1 year she changed schools so I rarely saw her, just very sometimes on some local parties.

Now, almost a year ago she invited me to a little party. I went there, had a good time and really became good friends with her and started to see her like every week since then.
I fell in love with her, but I hadn't really told or showed her yet. After some time (few months...) we were in this bar and she told me that she just felt i liked her. She said she thinks i'm a cool guy, a really good mate, but didn't have feelings for me. I told her i was happy to have it off my chest and we "agreed" we could still stay good friends as we were up till then.

Now again a few months later we are still good friends, see eachother very often but we haven't spoken 1 word about that again, it almost seems like she's forgotten it. But the problem is that I haven't and that i still like here a lot.

I really want to move on and just be friends with her, but it feels like I can't start to like other girls anymore. Just hanging out with her as friends actually works well, but sometimes I still feel a bit uncomfortable around her.

anyone around that can do magic? or just some good advice?
thanks

(i'm 18, she almost 17 )

[MerryH]

I told her i was happy to have it off my chest and we "agreed" we could still stay good friends as we were up till then.

You put "agreed" in quotation marks. Why did you do that? If you were to read that sentence aloud, it would almost require an eye roll at "agreed", complete with the double fingered "air quotes" which is usually hilarious, but i wonder why you wrote it that way?

Is it because you were lying (to her and yourself, probably unintentionally) when you gave your word that you could be a platonic friend? Well, now you know that you can't be just friends because you won't stop crushing on her. So your friendship is dishonest. You want to be more than friends, and she's operating under the assumption that you are fine with being just friends, because that's what you "agreed" to. Seems unhealthy. Maybe it's time to break it off and not be friends anymore.

[devonbrown]

If you enjoy being friends with her, that is great. As for how to get over her though, you have to put a little distance between you. Not a large amount, just enough for you to notice that there are other girls out there and expand your romantic interests.

You still have feelings for her because you haven't given yourself room to look for other people you could have feelings for. Do that and it may help a lot.

Good luck.

[tomvd]

I just said "agreed" because i didn't really know another way to say it. English is not my mothertongue. Tell me if there are more hard to understand sentences of mine

I like her alot and i know she likes me also (but as friends propably :p )
It was more like this actually:
I was sitting quite close to her, and we were just a bit smiling.
she: you quite like me huh, am i right?
me: well yeah... kinda ..
she: well i had seen it coming actually
me: was it that clearly?
she: yeah kinda, i think it's better we stay friends for now
me: yeh maybe you're right...

that was it. we were both going to go home soon, so we did only stay for another 5-10 minutes or so

I was still at her home an hour ago and we had a good time, with some other people around us. And today for exaple i had no problems at all just being there as a friend of hers. It's just that sometimes when I'm alone with her and we are just talking and smiling a bit to eachother, that I have a hard time accepting that it's just a "friendship smile"

[The Gent]

Broseph, you need to be like Indiana Jones in this sort of situation. Start cracking your whip & give this girl the pink slip!
The more time you spend with her, the more you're gonna want to be with her. I'm unsure of this girls name, so let's just call her 'Megatron'.

Dude, if you won't give any other girl but Megatron a chance, you're never gonna shake this feeling off. She's told you she's happy being friends & unless she says otherwise, it seems like that's how it's gonna remain.
Try going to more parties with your buddies, you'll eventually meet someone & hit it off. May not seem that way at the moment my friend. But, once you start mixing with other girls, you'll see that Megatron isn't the be all & end all of your life.

Good luck!

[DarkHelmet82]

Broseph, you need to be like Indiana Jones in this sort of situation. Start cracking your whip & give this girl the pink slip!
The more time you spend with her, the more you're gonna want to be with her. I'm unsure of this girls name, so let's just call her 'Megatron'.

Dude, if you won't give any other girl but Megatron a chance, you're never gonna shake this feeling off. She's told you she's happy being friends & unless she says otherwise, it seems like that's how it's gonna remain.
Try going to more parties with your buddies, you'll eventually meet someone & hit it off. May not seem that way at the moment my friend. But, once you start mixing with other girls, you'll see that Megatron isn't the be all & end all of your life.

Good luck!

Dude where do you come up with this shit.. indiana jones and megatron.. lmfao

[DarkHelmet82]

i cant stop laughing.. megatron.. hahaha

[tomvd]

Thanks for the advice so far.
It is maybe true that I should put a little bit more distance between us, but that's kinda hard because we really are almost like best friends now :s
And I think me going more to parties is physically almost impossible. A lot with her, but even more with my other friends. It's just that when i meet other girls i don't feel attracted. (Ofcourse, you can't be attracted by every girl but still.)

[The Gent]

Dude where do you come up with this shit.. indiana jones and megatron.. lmfao

Just like to keep things fresh, dude!

[DarkHelmet82]

You may even meet Voltron or Sheerah and then bam XENA warrior princess comes into your life. At least he told you to be Indiana Jones not ALF.. lmaoi

[VincenzoG91]

Dude where do you come up with this shit.. indiana jones and megatron.. lmfao

The Gent is actually Shia LePouf.

[The Gent]

Op, if you end up meeting Xena after following my advice. You gotta post a picture here, bro!

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Nicht seiner Muttespreche? Sorry, my Deutscheleherin told us, Germans call their native language, mothertongue, but I've never seen/heard it used in conversation.

Anyway, time to cut this girl off completely, at least for a while. You don't want to be friends, and frankly, you're not her friend. You're a guy with a romantic interest in her. Just stop initiating contact with her, and stop responding to contact that she starts. If she doesn't pick up on the hint, she will probably ask you what's wrong, and you can just tell her that you still see her as more than a friend and you'd appreciate it if she left you alone.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

DarkHelmet82, you're talking a whole lotta shit for a guy with a Darth Vader avatar.

Ninja Turtles will kill all these fools..except Tarzan.

[DarkHelmet82]

DarkHelmet82, you're talking a whole lotta shit for a guy with a Darth Vader avatar.

Ninja Turtles will kill all these fools..except Tarzan.

Its actually a DarkHelmet avatar from Spaceballs. But i do own two lightsabers lol