Gave him an STI?

[LaMb ChOp]

I met this guy in June and we went on our first date in July. We slept with eachother almost two weeks after our first date, in the first week of August. We have slept together several times since then and things have gotten more serious between us. I actually think he was trying to tell me he loves me the other day but he seems to struggle being open about his feelings.

Recently we had a discussion about STI's. He told me that he had never had one and that before sleeping with me he hadn't been with anyone else for months and he had been checked and was clear. I told him that I was checked in June however I had slept with one other person since then, without a condom.

He has just phoned me to tell me that he has been experiencing itching on the inside of his penis, and he has been to the GUM clinic for tests this morning. He has been told not to do anything sexual until his results come through in the next two weeks. He said he was telling me out of courtesy and so I wouldn't wonder why he wasn't having sex with me. He reiterated that he had never had an STI before and he thinks I should go and get checked.

I am absolutely mortified to think that I may have had an STI and wasn't aware and that I could have given it to him. He moves home next week (300 miles from me) and I want a long distance relationship with him but I can't help but think this will put him off me. The fact we can't have sex before he goes is disappointing too. I feel like I've ruined everything. I told him I was embarassed and he thought I meant about going to the clinic and said not to be embarassed and they are just doing there job etc and I said no I'm embrassed at what you think and he told me not to be silly and these things happen. It's all very well saying that now but I'm worried that if the results show he does have something, and the fact he will be hundreds of miles away from me when he finds out, he is going to think differently about me and won't want anything more to do with me. I'm interested to know what guys think about this, has your g/f given you an STI and what did you think? Would it put you off your g/f if this happened to you? Or am I over reacting?

[Wakeup]

Grow the heck up and go get yourself tested and quit ****ing guys without a condom. Lets hope it's not HIV.
worry about what he thinks about you after you've BOTH gotten your results.

Wisen up, this is about your sexual health. Herpes lasts forever btw. Never have unprotected sex with someone until you've been exclusive for at least a year wherein you've BOTH had two full screenings that have come back clean. I hope you're on some sort of birth control too.

He moves home next week (300 miles from me) and I want a long distance relationship with him but I can't help but think this will put him off me.

I'm thinking the 300 miles apart from one another will put him off you, never mind the STI.. Get your self STI/STD screened asap.

[misombra]

Leswon learned hopefully. Always use condoms. Dont give it up so quickly.

[bulrush]

Itching inside his urethra probably indicates a bacterial infection, which can be cured. You should hope it's bacterial anyway.

Maybe use a love glove from now on.

[HeartIsAching]

There's a motorcycle acronym that is appropriate here: ATTGATT - All the Gear, All the Time! Use condoms, at LEAST until you're positive you're in a monogamous relationship and either are ready to have babies or are using at least one other EFFECTIVE form of birth control.

[upandaway]

Some of us are just ****ing dumb, dont worry OP, I was too. I hope you have already made the appointment to get checked. Having any one of the bacterial infections too long can make you sterile. When I was 19 I got an std from having unprotected sex. Actually the results came up positive for both chlamydia and gonorrhea Often women are asymptomatic, so the same thing happened, a guy I was sleeping with at the time told me something was wrong (I cant remember what symptom he was having) and that I should go get checked out. We had actually just got done having sex when I got the phone call from the Dr with the results. Me and this guy werent a couple, it was a totally screwed up 'relationship' thing (if you could even call it that). I know he wasnt sleeping with anyone else at the time, but I was being young and dumb and was going through a phase of sleeping with a bunch of randoms, and had not used a condom with 2 different men, YUCK! I was really broke right then, and the guy I infected actually paid for my antibiotics, and we still slept together for another year. Though, with the volatile nature of our relationship, its not real surprising that things continued on. In a more normal relationship, I could see how giving your partner an std would be a pretty big ****ing deal.

[mwahahaha]

Sex before marriage never has a happy ending, get yourself checked, get a playstation and stop bumping with strangers. In no time you ll be under par and breaking course records just like the great tiger. ( before he met that slut and totalled his ride, lol).

[sadie_genie]

You slept with one other person and you didn't take the crucial step to get checked. This is why we should lock up people like you who acts this irresponsibly.

[Jazzersize]

This is why I always use a condom, no matter how clean she swears she is. Women are braindead ****s. If a girl gave me an STI I'd kick her ****ing head in for her.

[Red Apollo]

I'm pretty sure if I got an STI from a girl it might negatively impact my feelings. It wouldn't just be; "These things happen."

[Wakeup]

This is why I always use a condom, no matter how clean she swears she is. Women are braindead ****s. If a girl gave me an STI I'd kick her ****ing head in for her.

How charming!

[LaMb ChOp]

I know what I did was wrong but he knew what he was doing- I didn't force him into sleeping with me infact he initiated it and he didn't have any condoms or ask me if I had any. I'm on the pill but it took for us to be at it for afew mins before he actually stopped to consider that and ask me whether or not I'm on the pill so he acted irresponsibly too. It was after we had slept together afew times that he asked me if I had been checked for any STI's recently. I saw him last night and he kept going on about the virus I've given him and how he wants me to tell the guy I slept with and give him **** over it. I asked him if he's going to hate me if I have given him something and he said yes, then he said only for half an hour or so and then he should be OK. I kept bringing it up and he said the more I talked about it the more annoyed he was likely to get so he asked me to stop. He is basically itching alot down there and he feels feverish. I have got absolutely no symptoms of having anything.

Judge me all you like but I would prefer some constructive criticism. If we remain a couple then at least we will have both been checked and treated for anything we might have. If we don't remain a couple I am most definately not having sex, or oral sex, from anyone until they can prove to me that since they last slept with someone they have been checked and are clear. I am not going to put myself in this position again. We all make mistakes but as long as we learn from them then something positive can come out of it.

[sadie_genie]

I know what I did was wrong but he knew what he was doing- I didn't force him into sleeping with me infact he initiated it and he didn't have any condoms or ask me if I had any. I'm on the pill but it took for us to be at it for afew mins before he actually stopped to consider that and ask me whether or not I'm on the pill so he acted irresponsibly too. It was after we had slept together afew times that he asked me if I had been checked for any STI's recently. I saw him last night and he kept going on about the virus I've given him and how he wants me to tell the guy I slept with and give him **** over it. I asked him if he's going to hate me if I have given him something and he said yes, then he said only for half an hour or so and then he should be OK. I kept bringing it up and he said the more I talked about it the more annoyed he was likely to get so he asked me to stop. He is basically itching alot down there and he feels feverish. I have got absolutely no symptoms of having anything.

Judge me all you like but I would prefer some constructive criticism. If we remain a couple then at least we will have both been checked and treated for anything we might have. If we don't remain a couple I am most definately not having sex, or oral sex, from anyone until they can prove to me that since they last slept with someone they have been checked and are clear. I am not going to put myself in this position again. We all make mistakes but as long as we learn from them then something positive can come out of it.

Here is some constructive criticism: Don't try to share the blame for this. It would have been prevented IF you had taken measures to get yourself checked (which is something you should be doing anyways) and refuse to have sex with him (even if he initiated) until you know you are clean. Just because he was also irresponsible, it doesn't mean you are any less responsible for what you have done. Each person should not take 50 percent of the responsibility but take a full 100 percent of it; to do everything they can to prevent the circulation of viruses. Next time, don't be intimate with someone unless they are checked recently, clean, and exclusive with you. AND when you are as well. Virus can be passed from both ways.

[bulrush]

Sex before marriage never has a happy ending, get yourself checked, get a playstation and stop bumping with strangers. In no time you ll be under par and breaking course records just like the great tiger. ( before he met that slut and totalled his ride, lol).

Please do not over generalize using words like "always" or "never". My marriage was worse than any of my other non-married relationships.

This is why I always use a condom, no matter how clean she swears she is. Women are braindead ****s.

Both men and women allow their emotions to make bad decisions sometimes. It's not just women.

[Wakeup]

Op: Please don't try to justify your bad choices by saying things like "I didn't force him to **** me" (paraphrasing) You take care of You and if he doesn't have a rubber then you stave off the sex until he gets one. In fact if you're so easily swayed by fresh dick, please carry your own in your purse and then you can schtuup away with abandon. You're not only taking your own sexual health into the danger zone but you're spreading it around to other people too so just be in control of yourself and tell anyone without a rubber ~ "No glove, no love." I'm sure your poonanny wouldn't have closed up if you had gone without it for one night until you could have secured some condoms.

Hopefully it's not herpes.