My sister is dating a loser. Me, my mom, and dad do NOT approve.

[Andariel]

Like I said, findign a job is paramount to her becoming more responsible and independent and also to your parents viewing her as an adult and therefore respecting the decisions she makes. This needs to be made clear to her during that discussion. This guy is only a symptom of her carefree attitude towards life and I'm sure once she becomes her own person she won't want anything to do with him after a while. The more confident she becomes, the more she will want to have someone by her side who deserves her.Right now she might be settling for soemthing less because she doesn't feel confident enough in her own skin to aim for something better.This is why they should let her date the guy if she wants to. This way they are telling her: date whoever you want but know that as long as you live in this house (and therefore you are not independent) there will be rules that you will need to abide to and for instance, you can only see him x times of the week or something like that.This way becoming independent will be like a carrot to her; something to aspire to in order to be able to live life on her own terms.

He is not the problem. She is. She needs to realise she has to take responsibility for herself and everything else will hopefully fall into place when the time is right. Your parents need to be very firm about the timeline she needs to complete her degree and get a job in and make it clear that after that they will not be willing to support her anymore.I know it sounds harsh but sometimes tough love is necessary to help our loved ones. She has plenty of time to find a job; besides she can start doing a part-time unpaid internhsip while she is still studying to boost her CV so that she will have more chances of finding a job once she completes her degree. ALso, she needs to realise that she won't find the job she wants immediately after graduating so she must be willing to compromise and build up her experience to get her dream job a few years down the line.

Open commiunication, love and understanding on both sides is really important for this to work.Your role could be that of an impartial third party who is willing to offer advice and support to both your parents and sister during this time.Don't make either of them feel like they can't talk to you by appearing too distant or unintrested in what is going on but also you should retain a reasonable , impartial view on things to be able to offer constructive advice and so that both your sister and parents don't feel alienated.

[HeartIsAching]

An entire family of control freaks! How incredibly unusual. Oh wait... not it's not.

Y'all got issues.

[KingZ]

An entire family of control freaks! How incredibly unusual. Oh wait... not it's not.

Y'all got issues.

Does your mom know you're using her computer?

My main point, is that both my Parents disapprove of this guy too. And my sister is living under their roof. So shouldn't she still be treated like a kid?

Is she a child? No, she is not. So don't treat her like one. You should try really hard to put yourself in her shoes.




(I hope someone points out the double-meta-whatever irony in this post.)

[HeartIsAching]

Does your mom know you're using her computer?



Is she a child? No, she is not. So don't treat her like one. You should try really hard to put yourself in her shoes.




(I hope someone points out the double-meta-whatever irony in this post.)

Awww... does your pussy hurt, little man? Or does it just itch?

[vampiress]

The hell with you and your mom and dad... leave the girl alone and mind your own business ...
control freaks....... huh

[KingZ]

Awww... does your pussy hurt, little man? Or does it just itch?

Since you seem to be retarded, I'll spoon-feed you the obvious:

Does your mom know you're using her computer?

^ Example of treating an adult like a child.

Is she a child? No, she is not. So don't treat her like one.

^ Preaching to not treat an adult like a child.

(I hope someone points out the double-meta-whatever irony in this post.)

^ Initial attempt at spoon-feeding you simple, self-referencing (meta) concepts.


^ Second attempt at spoon-feeding you simple, self-referencing (meta) concepts.

Your retort:

YOU'RE A WOMAN!

[Losername]

Like I said, findign a job is paramount to her becoming more responsible and independent and also to your parents viewing her as an adult and therefore respecting the decisions she makes. This needs to be made clear to her during that discussion. This guy is only a symptom of her carefree attitude towards life and I'm sure once she becomes her own person she won't want anything to do with him after a while. The more confident she becomes, the more she will want to have someone by her side who deserves her.Right now she might be settling for soemthing less because she doesn't feel confident enough in her own skin to aim for something better.This is why they should let her date the guy if she wants to. This way they are telling her: date whoever you want but know that as long as you live in this house (and therefore you are not independent) there will be rules that you will need to abide to and for instance, you can only see him x times of the week or something like that.This way becoming independent will be like a carrot to her; something to aspire to in order to be able to live life on her own terms.

He is not the problem. She is. She needs to realise she has to take responsibility for herself and everything else will hopefully fall into place when the time is right. Your parents need to be very firm about the timeline she needs to complete her degree and get a job in and make it clear that after that they will not be willing to support her anymore.I know it sounds harsh but sometimes tough love is necessary to help our loved ones. She has plenty of time to find a job; besides she can start doing a part-time unpaid internhsip while she is still studying to boost her CV so that she will have more chances of finding a job once she completes her degree. ALso, she needs to realise that she won't find the job she wants immediately after graduating so she must be willing to compromise and build up her experience to get her dream job a few years down the line.

Open commiunication, love and understanding on both sides is really important for this to work.Your role could be that of an impartial third party who is willing to offer advice and support to both your parents and sister during this time.Don't make either of them feel like they can't talk to you by appearing too distant or unintrested in what is going on but also you should retain a reasonable , impartial view on things to be able to offer constructive advice and so that both your sister and parents don't feel alienated.

You have been more than helpful. Thanks for helping a complete stranger on here! This is a really good forum, and it needs people like you to offer advice. Thanks also for being honest in your replies and advice. Enjoy what's rest of the weekend!

[Losername]

^^^ geeezus, the evil twin has surfaced.

OP: Mind your own business. Who The F do you think you are? Leave this for your sister and her parents to resolve and quit trying to control and alienate your sister. You are NOT HER KEEPER.

Yup! I've been over this already. I'm going to change my stance on this. I already had a talk with my sister this morning, and we now see eye to eye. Instead of being against her, I'm going to support her. Like Andraeiel said...

Open commiunication, love and understanding on both sides is really important for this to work.Your role could be that of an impartial third party who is willing to offer advice and support to both your parents and sister during this time.Don't make either of them feel like they can't talk to you by appearing too distant or unintrested in what is going on but also you should retain a reasonable , impartial view on things to be able to offer constructive advice and so that both your sister and parents don't feel alienated.

[Wakeup]

Yup! I've been over this already. I'm going to change my stance on this. I already had a talk with my sister this morning, and we now see eye to eye. Instead of being against her, I'm going to support her. Like Andraeiel said...

I snipped that post, OP. I saw that you'd changed your stance... good luck.

[xdxsyyb]

Am I making sense here?

[Superfantastich]

This sounds a little bit my my insensitive family, just leave her alone..