Found out girlfriend is looking at and posting w4w ads

[dsulmnl]

Alright, I'll try to make this short. I live with my girlfriend and we just celebrated our 2 year anniversary. I was on her computer the other day (not snooping), typed in something in the browser and I noticed a few craigslist w4w casual encounters ads in the history.

This obviously made me a little curious so I started looking at her history and saw that she posted an ad of her own while I was out of town a couple weeks ago. It said something to the effect of "I've been thinking about being with a woman again, must be discreet, etc." and she gave a brief description of herself.

Being that I was gone I have no idea if anything came of this, also I didn't see anything showing that she was looking for another guy. So because she was looking for a fling with a woman I don't know how to think of this...I mean is it cheating? I guess but I don't feel nearly as betrayed as I would if she was looking at/for another man.

Basically I'm just looking for some advice, never dealt with anything like this and I don't know what to think of it. Should I bring it up with her? If so, what would be the best approach? For other guys: would you end the relationship if you found out about something like this?

[surfhb]

Of course its cheating.

You need to explain how you found them and confront her. Generally, its not healthy

[smackie9]

You are going to have to call her out on it. If she is a closet lesbian, he secret is now found out. If she is bi, maybe you could be open to have her invite a girl over for all of you to have fun.

[James Banes]

Yeah, call her out on it. Either that or print the document, and, if she ever catches you cheating, show her the document. Then she'll be too surprised to know how to counter.

[bloodtippedrose]

Reply to her Craigslist ad and catch her in a lie

(^ not good advice, but fun!)

[bulrush]

Yes it's cheating technically. But she's obviously too nervous to tell you about it. Will you support her doing this? Can you talk to her in a positive way about this? You will have to be the one to start the talk, she won't as she's too nervous. She sounds like she's bi.

So, let's make it "not cheating" by you talking about it with her. Maybe you can make this work, if she will just be honest about it. If she's not honest about it, then you know you are dealing with a liar who doesn't have to courage to be herself.

[vashti]

Yes it's cheating technically. But she's obviously too nervous to tell you about it. Will you support her doing this? Can you talk to her in a positive way about this? You will have to be the one to start the talk, she won't as she's too nervous. She sounds like she's bi.

So, let's make it "not cheating" by you talking about it with her. Maybe you can make this work, if she will just be honest about it. If she's not honest about it, then you know you are dealing with a liar who doesn't have to courage to be herself.

Is this the response you would have given if she were attempting to meet a man?

[Mathias]

Yes it's cheating technically.

No, not technically. It is cheating. Period.

[bulrush]

Yes it's cheating technically. But she's obviously too nervous to tell you about it. Will you support her doing this? Can you talk to her in a positive way about this? You will have to be the one to start the talk, she won't as she's too nervous. She sounds like she's bi.

So, let's make it "not cheating" by you talking about it with her. Maybe you can make this work, if she will just be honest about it. If she's not honest about it, then you know you are dealing with a liar who doesn't have to courage to be herself.

Is this the response you would have given if she were attempting to meet a man?

Yes. Everyone has their own preferences, and it pays to be honest about everything. Not that I expect too many people to agree with me here.

You do know there are couples that swing with other couples, right? Usually they trade partners with long-time friends to mitigate disease issues. They don't prefer to "swing" with strangers. I've heard of couples who are happily married, and they "swing" with their best friends, and everyone is happy about it. One has to watch out for single guys (or girls) where the spouse doesn't know what is going on.

[oldskool83]

somthing up with her and shes being stupid. documentation is the all time kick in the snatch.....im not saying be a dick but bring the issue up. damn internet is the root of all evil.

[bulrush]

damn internet is the root of all evil.

The internet is simply a tool. People choose to be honest about stuff...or not. It's about the people, not the tool.

[noerrorsfound]

Reply to her Craigslist ad and catch her in a lie

(^ not good advice, but fun!)

Reply back; agree to meet in discreet location; HILARITY ENSUES!

[Dilemma01]

I definitely think it is cheating. But why don't you just ask her? If you weren't snooping or even if you were.. just ask. Has she told you before she used to be into women?