Might have pushed away amazing girl please help! Blocked on facebook!

[smackie9]

Here's the thing, she won't respond to any of your messages so what makes you think an apology will make things different. If it will make you feel better then do it, because I feel she at least owes you an explanation. If she doesn't then she isn't worth it if this is how she treats people.

[wanderlustboy]

She left for a 3 day weekend to visit family out of state. Now here's where I started messing things up royally: I commented on a couple of her facebook pics of her with family she just uploaded, just saying that I liked them, nothing offensive or anything. She didn't like that and put me on restricted list so that I can't see any of her pics now FML Sad. And also that day I texted her twice saying how was she and that I missed her and also called her once. She hasn't responded to my texts or call.

In contrast to my fellow LF'ers, I call shenanigans. I wouldn't invite someone to be a Facebook friend if I didn't want them to be able to see things that I posted. And if I was keen on someone as she seemed to be with you, I wouldn't let an honest mistake that was essentially my fault (requesting FB friendship, or not making clear that she has some Facebook hangup) get in the way of pursuing what could be a promising relationship.

My assessment (probably not what you want to hear), it really has nothing to do with your alleged impropriety; she probably got upset about the Facebook thing beacuse there are two people whose roles in her life must remain unknown to each other. In other words, there's another guy in all likelihood, and if she was a woman and not an immature crybaby, she would clearly indicate what she felt you had done wrong and discontinue anything romantic (if she was that histrionic), or she clearly indicate what she felt you had done wrong, and then, like a normal person, get the **** over it.

wlboy

[wanderlustboy]

yeah, I hear you smackie, you might have a point. I f'ing hate this passive-aggressive BS. I'd rather be told to my face, dude, you are coming on too strong, chill f out. Maybe she blocked me because she didn't want me to see pictures of her and some dudes, who the hell knows...

It seemed kind of childish, I don't know if she's had bad experiences in the past with faceboock stockers. I wouldn't come out and apologize, I would say like "if it seemed to you I was coming on too hard, than I didn't mean for that to happen... if you are still interested, then contact me" and that's it!

Having seen what everyone else wrote since I originally read mwahahahaha's reply, and seen that almost everyone is on the same page, you can reasonably conclude;

(a) She's mental
(b) She's got another guy in her life

From your description, I don't think you came on too strong at all, and I personally think that all these mind games and strategems about who calls/texts who first, and how often, and how often to wait, so that you don't come across as clingy, is so much bullshit (within reason of course, but I think I can safely exclude stalker behaviour in your case), Being yourself is a far more effective strategy that holding to these Byzantine rules about communication with someone you fancy, prescribing how soon you can contact them, how often you can contact them, and what subjects you;re allowed to discussl.

If things are this complicated already, just get back out there as there are plenty more fish in the sea.

wlboy

[DatingWoes]

yeah, thanks for input guys. Basically my goal is to let her go, move on, and never contact her. I will not put up with this BS. Period. End of Story. Thanks everyone for playing!

[wanderlustboy]

A sensible decision, and well said; you really don't need that kind of nonsense, and there are plenty of other fish in the sea.

Best of luck in the future

wlboy

[DatingWoes]

Thank you everyone. I think what I also realize is that whatever her reasons might be, I just don't need this tremendous amount of BS and DRAMA in my life, where I have to spend my entire weekend trying to decipher her mind games. NO!

[IndiReloaded]

Wow, even the tone of your posts here sound a bit, well, lets call it 'intense'. You've only known this girl 10 days and 3 dates. *I'm* taken aback, and I wasn't even on your dates.

I don't think you erred only w/the facebook comments but you have come on too strong in a number of ways. Sounds like you acted like a drowning man grasping at a line. Next time when you really like someone, that's the time to control yourself even more. I don't think she's coming back, but you never know.

[DatingWoes]

Well, I do have an intense personality, and I know it's a problem. I do realize I have come on too strong, but what she did was extremely immature, not cool. Out of curiosity, why do people think she just wouldn't unfriend me and get it over with? I mean, what's with this game, just partially blocking someone?

[IndiReloaded]

Well, I do have an intense personality, and I know it's a problem. I do realize I have come on too strong, but what she did was extremely immature, not cool.

Immature, not cool? LOL, even if its true why should she care what you think? You are barely nothing to her. Get over yourself. Why don't you just block/unfriend her? Stop thinking about things you have no control over. You are starting to sound like a controlling, crazy guy. Maybe she sensed this and decided to run?

[oneandonly]

......I have to spend my entire weekend trying to decipher her mind games.....

You chose to mull over things that you have no control over. It's your own doing. They may not be mind games. People have a different way of dealing with situations.

Stop thinking about things you have no control over.

Try the above cos it's not really healthy to be obsessed about someone you barely know. Chill and keep dating lighthearted till you figure out the person is on the same page as you. That's for your own benefit. It really takes a lot longer to know someone enough.

[Mathias]

Well, I do have an intense personality, and I know it's a problem. I do realize I have come on too strong, but what she did was extremely immature, not cool. Out of curiosity, why do people think she just wouldn't unfriend me and get it over with? I mean, what's with this game, just partially blocking someone?

Maybe so you'd get the hint before you embarrassed yourself?

Honestly, who knows. If you spend your time trying to interpret the nuances of her actions, you're going to drive yourself nuts. Stick to what you know.

[devonbrown]

I think everyone is missing something important here. This has nothing to do with the OP liking the pictures of her family on FB. She was acting weird on the second date. Something was already going on in her head. What was going on we have no idea. Maybe it was another guy. Maybe seeing the ex when she was out made her uncomfortable with dating. Maybe she thought the OP was coming on too strong. Maybe she was abducted by aliens. Who knows. The thing is that the OP didn't pick up on that hint. And him commenting on her pictures said to her that he didn't listen to her, no matter how confusing her attempted communication might have been. She obviously doesn't communicate well, but there were red flags being waved here that were ignored because he liked her. No big deal normally, it just means that this might not be right relationship to pursue.

Just a few thoughts...

[DatingWoes]

yeah, coming on too strong is my middle name, and I am trying to work on it...FML

yeah, it was actually the third date when she was acting weird, she actually told me ahead of time she was tired and a little under the weather so she couldn't stay up too late. She did apologize later on at her place that she was acting a little weird that night....so yeah, I didn't see no red flags.

She also insisted on and did pay for her part of the bill, is that also a red flag?

[Mathias]

I think everyone is missing something important here. This has nothing to do with the OP liking the pictures of her family on FB. She was acting weird on the second date. Something was already going on in her head. What was going on we have no idea. Maybe it was another guy. Maybe seeing the ex when she was out made her uncomfortable with dating. Maybe she thought the OP was coming on too strong. Maybe she was abducted by aliens. Who knows. The thing is that the OP didn't pick up on that hint. And him commenting on her pictures said to her that he didn't listen to her, no matter how confusing her attempted communication might have been. She obviously doesn't communicate well, but there were red flags being waved here that were ignored because he liked her. No big deal normally, it just means that this might not be right relationship to pursue.

Just a few thoughts...

I'm not missing it, I just don't care.

Yes, she's probably a nutjob. She overreacted to what he did on multiple occasions. But the point is to help the OP, not her. He's probably a bit over-aggressive, which is going to turn "normal" women off, and this relationship is probably over.

Trying to get those two points in his head is way more important than bashing on her.

[smackie9]

She gave you a shot, didn't feel anything for you, paid for her part of the date out of guilt, and dropped off the face of the earth. Just don't know why people can't be honest and say I don't think think we should continue, or I'm not feeling anything for you, or whatever. People would rather put you on ingnore and hope you will get the hint and go away.