My ex-bf and I had a really intense 2 hour conversation yesterday, and I'm still a little confused over it. I don't understand how his mind is thinking. He said when he asked me out he liked me a LOT! But apparently I used to keep telling him that he was not my type, and that this wouldn't last because we work together and he is 3 years younger than me. He found himself still caring a lot for me, but liking me a little less than when we first started dating. His reason for breaking up (and he has explained this to me a few times over and over again), is that he is not ready for a relationship. This was his first real relatioinship at 23, and he just started his phd. He said it stresses him out being in a relationship, and right now he just wants some of his own time to think about himself, mature, and do really well in school. He seems to want to work ALL the time. And his only break is when he goes to the gym.
We never had any fights until this sudden breakup. He used to care for me a LOT, and now I feel like he has lost all romantic feelings for me. He keeps telling me he still likes me, over and over again..and that it frustrates him everytime I don't believe that.
Can someone really be not ready for the commitment of a relationship at 23? Did I make him feel insecure in the relationship? I feel like I screwed things up big time, and now I feel so sad without him. I told him that clearly I liked him a LOT, otherwise the breakup wouldn't be this tough...and he said he can't go back into something he doesn't want to, which is a relationship. He told me that holding on like this is not healthy...it keeps opening up old wounds, and we should both move on. I am having sooo much trouble moving on. I really liked him. He wants to be best friends and gets very upset if I am ever mad at him as friend.
As a guy, what would you suggest I do about this situation? We work together, so no contact is not really an option. What is he thinking? Did he just stop liking me? Or can someone not be ready? Is there any hope left??