Want to marry a financially poor girl but parents dislike her

[searock]

You shouldn't get married now. Tell her that you simply aren't ready, either financially or emotionally. You aren't emotionally ready because you've only known this girl for a very short time, you've never even lived together. Tell her that if she agrees, you can keep having a relationship in which one of you moves to the other person's city, so that it won't be a long-distance relationship anymore and you will get to actually know each other. If all goes well, with her and with your and her careers, then you can talk about marriage. There is no rush!

[bcgirl]

If u are having these sorts of issues that u don't know what to say to her, this is one indicator of the fact that u shouldn't get married

[smackie9]

She wants to get married and start have babies because she is getting too long in the tooth. Her family is telling her if she waits any longer no man will want to marry an old maid like her. You are not ready so stop poking at the idea. Don't listen to your mom either...when you are ready you marry whomever you want. Don't worry you have plenty of time to fall in love with the right girl. In the meantime date other girls just for enjoyment and sex.

[sadie_genie]

I am so freaking jealous after reading this. I wanted a guy who I have dated for over a year (and have known for 5 years) to just think about the future with me and to "potentially" get married within a few years, he freaks out and abandones me. But anyways, you should still get to know the girl a little better (at least for a year or two) before you marry her. Your parents are trying to look out for you and what they said has some truth but I don't think they are entirely right. Having money doesn't lead to happiness. If the love is strong, it will make you happier than being financially better off. But being really really poor will make you both suffer too. So, make sure the girl is hardworking and would be willing to do her best to contribute financially too.

[arslan89]

I appreciate all of you for helping me and providing me your valuable suggestions. So friends, yesterday night I called her phone and we talked almost 1 hour and 30 minutes. Then suddenly she dropped the call during our conversation. After 15 minutes I got her text on my phone that her mother has forbidden her to speak to me. She also told me that her mother thinks that I will not marry to her and I'm just wasting their time. Then my gf was asking me again to bring my parents to their home for fixing our marriage date. She told me that she can talk to me just on text but will not take my calls and speak to me until we get married because her parents don't like it. She has given time limit of one month to send my parents to her home to talk to their parents about marriage. She also asked me if I don't want to marry her then I could find another girl to marry and she will be happy with it. Then I told her my financial problems that I am not financially in a position to get married to her this early. Then she asked me about my income and savings. I told her I spend all my salary on food, clothes etc. I also told her that my brothers and sister will not attend the marriage because they don't want me to marry this early and only me and mom can come to your home if you want. Then she was looking a bit tensed and replied me after few minutes. She said to me "just come with your mother, within a month, to our home to talk to my parents about our marriage proposal." With this situation I think that getting married is her sole purpose of life and she sees me just an option as in spite of telling her that I only love her and will marry to her, she will keep telling me to that i should get married to some other girl if i don't like her. Now I'm thinking to be single and no longer with her. We usually keep talking over phone everyday. But today I have changed my routine I was just replying back to her texts and did not talk like crazy lovers which I usually do to her. I think she also didn't notice it and didn't take much interest to talk to me. I don't know whatever the problem is either something is wrong with me or with her.

[smackie9]

This isn't about marrying for love, she is desperate to get married because she hasn't found a husband yet...the clock is ticking away, she should have found a husband years ago. That should be a warning to you.....no one wanted to marry her probably of what you mom had said..no man wanted to take on supporting her broke ass family.

[sadie_genie]

I appreciate all of you for helping me and providing me your valuable suggestions. So friends, yesterday night I called her phone and we talked almost 1 hour and 30 minutes. Then suddenly she dropped the call during our conversation. After 15 minutes I got her text on my phone that her mother has forbidden her to speak to me. She also told me that her mother thinks that I will not marry to her and I'm just wasting their time. Then my gf was asking me again to bring my parents to their home for fixing our marriage date. She told me that she can talk to me just on text but will not take my calls and speak to me until we get married because her parents don't like it. She has given time limit of one month to send my parents to her home to talk to their parents about marriage. She also asked me if I don't want to marry her then I could find another girl to marry and she will be happy with it. Then I told her my financial problems that I am not financially in a position to get married to her this early. Then she asked me about my income and savings. I told her I spend all my salary on food, clothes etc. I also told her that my brothers and sister will not attend the marriage because they don't want me to marry this early and only me and mom can come to your home if you want. Then she was looking a bit tensed and replied me after few minutes. She said to me "just come with your mother, within a month, to our home to talk to my parents about our marriage proposal." With this situation I think that getting married is her sole purpose of life and she sees me just an option as in spite of telling her that I only love her and will marry to her, she will keep telling me to that i should get married to some other girl if i don't like her. Now I'm thinking to be single and no longer with her. We usually keep talking over phone everyday. But today I have changed my routine I was just replying back to her texts and did not talk like crazy lovers which I usually do to her. I think she also didn't notice it and didn't take much interest to talk to me. I don't know whatever the problem is either something is wrong with me or with her.

She is probably thinking "If he loves me, he would marry me". And you are thinking: "If she loves me, she wouldn't be pushing me so hard". Ugh. I do side with you on this one though. You are both rushing into this. She is being unreasonable. Try to talk to her once more. If that doesn't work, I would say follow her advice and marry another girl you can have more time to get to know better.

[Love'sReject]

Is she hot?

[bcgirl]

She's a girl, her parents are uber religious and the only way they would allow her daughter to date a man is if she gets married first. Thus she is pressuring u to marry her. If it wasn't u, it would be the next guy she dates.

[smackie9]

Here's what you can do...get your engineering degree and start traveling the world for work. Immigrate to a different country to get away from those stupid traditions and your parents grip. Make money, meet a nice lady and get married. The parents can't do jack shit because you are on your own, making a life for yourself. They can come visit to see the grand kids.

[arslan89]

Is she hot?

She is pretty.

She's a girl, her parents are uber religious and the only way they would allow her daughter to date a man is if she gets married first. Thus she is pressuring u to marry her. If it wasn't u, it would be the next guy she dates.

Yes this is what I meant to say.

Here's what you can do...get your engineering degree and start traveling the world for work. Immigrate to a different country to get away from those stupid traditions and your parents grip. Make money, meet a nice lady and get married. The parents can't do jack shit because you are on your own, making a life for yourself. They can come visit to see the grand kids.

haha that seems so interesting but you know what even I don't have enough money for visa to travel around world but I'm trying my best to collect money to fulfil my wishes and make my dreams come true.

[arslan89]

So guys I am not in much contact with her now. Since previous three days I'm not sending her many texts and calls on her cell phone like I used to do before. And you know what she also reduced texting me. Most of her texts are reply or response me. I have started thinking she is selfish. I think she is in contact with me because she is only concerned to get married to me. I guess she has no love or emotions for me. I am ignoring her and will soon forget her. Your suggestion is really important for me. I loved the way you guys are responding to my posts and indeed you're helping me alot.

[bcgirl]

A few days ago u r contemplating marriage, a few days later u two are heading for break up. Good thing u didn't do the stupid thing and propose

[smackie9]

Dude your employer will pay for your expenses so it is possible. My friend's landlord is an engineer, he is in demand, they pay to move him and his family where he is needed.

[arslan89]

A few days ago u r contemplating marriage, a few days later u two are heading for break up. Good thing u didn't do the stupid thing and propose

Well its not a breakup. I'm not gonna ask my parents to go to see their family because I think I'm not in that hurry to get married.

Dude your employer will pay for your expenses so it is possible. My friend's landlord is an engineer, he is in demand, they pay to move him and his family where he is needed.

Okay then pray for me that I get a good job in abroad really soon!