Broke up, need some advice

[Half-Full]

Hello everyone, I've ran into a weird situation and I need some advice.

So, I've been with this girl for few months until we broke up few days ago. She initiated the break-up, but let me tell you the story behind it.. We started off very nice, both liked each other very much and shared several fun activities which I'm pretty sure both of us will remember. That was on summer vacation, btw. After that, I started having deep thoughts about how much I really want her. Sometimes I felt like I want her so much, while other times it felt like she's not the one for me. I bet this started when I realised she's probably too much into me and it kinda drove me away. Unconsciously, this led me to be a more boring person around her and drove the relationship into a boring routine. Lately, I've been thinking of the reasons I liked her in the first place and realised that even if sometimes I just don't feel "in love" with her I really value her and still think she's one of the best girlfriends I've ever had. That's when I decided I should genuinely try and make things better and see if it works out. At the time though, she also started being colder around me until she actually said it to me: "Things have become boring between us, I don't think this is going to change, so we probably need to break up". I was pretty shocked, because that whole time I was used to being the one chased by her, and the fact that our timing was so bad since I had decided to give it last good go.. I told her it's not about the problems we have, because those I'm prepared to work for, but the real deal is if she still finds me attractive as a man. She told me she doesn't see me as a friend, but she's not that into me anymore. That's the end, I thought, perhaps for the better. At least I didn't break up with her when she really liked me and didn't hurt her feelings. But now I kinda feel like I want to get back with her.. I know it could just be the feeling of loss or that I just want to go back and fix things - we men kind of always feel like that. But I think I'm now starting to realise that I do have feelings for her. Is it too late to try and get her attention back? I'm pretty sure she still cares about me and all, but I've lost her sexual attraction and I'm not sure I can do anything about it. I do need some time to think for myself and make sure I want her and it's not just my ego, but what about sending her a nice friendly text in a month from now on her birthday? I think I will anyway, be it trying to get back with her or not, but how would it be received? And how could I get her to think of me again as a possible sexual partner if I actually make a genuine effort to make it better this time? I don't want to come off as needy, because I clearly am not, but this girl is pretty special and I don't want to let go just yet without giving it my full. Any advice?

[UKRomantic]

Sounds to me like you should just leave it and move on.

You had a chance but you decided she wasn't the one for you. Who's to say you won't feel this way again if things did start to go well again?

[Half-Full]

Thing is, I now am confused. That's why I need to make sure of how I feel before I make any move at all. But what If I decide I want to give it another go? My real question is, is her change of feelings irreversible? Because for me, it's like, there's still a fight going on in me

[UKRomantic]

I don't know, you have to hope she realises she likes you.

I'm just going through similar, at first I was a little unsure if I wanted a relationship but did like her. Then when I did realise my true feelings for her, she then decided she just wanted to be friends.

I'm gutted, hurt and feel lost as I've not really spoken to her since. I really hope I get that text saying she does like me and wants more but I have started to understand that ship has sailed and there's nothing going to happen so I'm going down the no contact road until my feelings pass or at least get a little easier. For all i know she's met someone else who she's more attracted to, which would explain why she's gone from really liking me, constantly wanting to talk to me to suddenly really cold.

You could tell her your real feelings, explain how you really like her, but from my experience that seems to have pushed her further away.

[Half-Full]

Well we had a good talk when it happened, told her that I too don't have as strong feelings as I used to, but also let her know that I'm willing to try once more. Her reaction was mostly "I don't think this will work out" and she started crying.. Does that really mean it was a tough choice for her because she still likes me a bit, or that she just felt bad about losing her feelings for me, I honestly can't tell. She also mentioned that she would like to keep some contact, but I told her that I can't see her as a friend right now so I won't be doing it at least for a while. There's no other guy, and this is one of the things that hurt me... she was so honest and real with me, I almost feel like I betrayed her. I'm not going to further express my feelings or whatever, I made it perfectly clear for her that I still want it to work but like I said I'm not needy and if she wants to move on, I will let her. Thing is, I mostly know that if it wasn't me that I felt kind of driven away from her too strong feelings (as i perceived it at that point), if I still was myself and shown real interest in her, she would probably be still in love with me. Could I awake those feelings inside her once again by being the real me which she fell in love with or is it too late though? That's what I'm actually dying to know. Any girls in here could give us some insight?

[UKRomantic]

Sounds pretty much like me to be honest.

I told her exactly how I feel, and that I realise things have been a bit off with us lately. But got the whole "I'm not sure what I want, we should just be friends because I don't want to let you feel like youre wasting your time". She then told me she does really like me but it just not sure what she wants, I shouldn't wait around for her as "you will soon realise I'm no good for you". This went on for a while, she got more and more upset telling me I'm making things worse by telling her how much I like her. I told her I can't just be friends so I don't want to carry on talking to each other like things are normal.

Been 2 weeks now, she's text me first twice but then gone all weird after. I told her I'd wait for her, more than happy to as I'm not desperate for a relationship and have no interest in anyone else and just got "Well if that's what you want to do, do it. But it's silly" since then i just said I understand and respect her decisions to just be friends, and have left her alone since.

She can now make the move and whilst ever we're not talking it's making it easier for me to accept and move on.