Boyfriend did not acknowledge my birthday today - should I be upset?

[AeroDawn]

I'm not sure if I should be upset because my boyfriend did not acknowledge my birthday today.

First off, he is in the Navy and has been underway since Friday past. He is expected back this Friday, but I got a Facebook message from him yesterday saying that it may be extended for another week. I know that internet access while underway can be rather spotty, but he was able to contact me yesterday - so why not today? Oddly enough, his Facebook status is showing him online all day today as well...

On the other hand, he did give me a wonderful gift before he left as well as a hand-written note that brought tears of joy to my eyes. So it's not as if he forgot. . .

On a related note that is really bothering me as well though...when I went on Facebook for the zillionth time today to see if he messaged me, I looked through his profile for the first time just out of curiousity.

He has his relationship status listed as single.

Thoughts?

[Starnique]

I also would be upset with this. I would feel some type of way. One of two things, maybe he really didn't forget and is teasing you and has a big surprise for you when he gets back. If he did forget, shame on him and in that case its shady for him to be online all day and not contact you. Anyway, don't contact him. Wait until he contacts you because after all, it is your birthday. Don't even mention it unless you really have to. He should catch on if he is really in touch with your feelings. He should know something is wrong right away. If he never mention it and he asks you whats up, just randomly throw out what you did on your birthday and at that point then you can go in on him if you feel the need. If he forgot, its pretty ****ed up because if it was important to him he would remember.

As for the single status, set yours to say in a relationship and tag him in on it so it can link to him. Problem solved.

[lalalita]

How long have you been together?

[smackie9]

hahaha that's funny....are you sure he is busy with his job and not busy with someone else at another port? Time to do a background check.

[AeroDawn]

How long have you been together?

We have been together nearly 10 months.

Also, in regards to him being in port...he is underway on a training exercise. He does not go to port during that time at all.

At any rate, I finally heard from him around 11:30 pm. No HBD though...just an update on when he will be back. Im too numb to care anymore.

[smackie9]

No need to be a bitch about it.

***If it were me I would have told him in a joking way to wish me a happy birthday, giggle about it, smile and tell him I miss him so much and to hurry up and get home.

[IndiReloaded]

No, you shouldn't be upset. The guy is away for military work. He got you a gift before he left. Seriously, you need to find something better to do with your time. Don't rely on your BF for attention. He'll be dumping you soon for someone less high-maintenance.

[basilandthyme]

Too numb to care? Oh hon, get a grip.....It's not like he didn't do anything for your birthday.

When hubby or I forget each other's birthday, we get a sense of humour and tease the other one by singing ourselves the birthday song. Then the forgetee laughs and remembers the gift and all is fixed. It's far more productive than getting in a huff over the whole thing.

[Starnique]

No, you shouldn't be upset. The guy is away for military work. He got you a gift before he left. Seriously, you need to find something better to do with your time. Don't rely on your BF for attention. He'll be dumping you soon for someone less high-maintenance.

This may come with age and personal opinions an dhow long you all have been together. Most chics aren't gonna be pleased about their boyfriends/husbands forgetting their birthday. Be for real here. That's not being high maintenance. It should be important to a person. Every since I became a mom, a couple of years ago. I care less about my birthday and its all about my daughter so I don't care about gifts per se. If I get a gift card for an example, I'll spend that shit on her lol. It is a kind gesture but if you kind to me all year long, no big deal. Wishing someone a happy birthday is thoughtful, requires no pressure or hard work and its free. He don't remember her bday but Im sure he greatly remembers things he like or value.

[basilandthyme]

This may come with age and personal opinions. Most chics aren't gonna be pleased about their boyfriends/husbands forgetting their birthday. Be for real here.

Forgetting to do anything, not even bothering to buy a gift....yes, I agree. But if a guy has done all the right preparations and then forgets on the actual day, then it's just funny.

FWIW, hubby has forgotten to give me my gift on more than one birthday, and I have forgotten his - so I am being 'for real'

[ClaireH]

Firstly, how long have you been dating? Guys often only change their Facebook status after a few months. Secondly, he DID remember you before he left. I know I would be hurt if it were me and he forgot on the day, especially as you are far apart, but maybe he has a legitimate excuse. Maybe give him the opportunity to explain or right the wrong?

[Starnique]

Forgetting to do anything, not even bothering to buy a gift....yes, I agree. But if a guy has done all the right preparations and then forgets on the actual day, then it's just funny.

FWIW, hubby has forgotten to give me my gift on more than one birthday, and I have forgotten his - so I am being 'for real'

I understand and agree with the gift part and maybe forgetting on the day. It just really depends on how he is I guess. Most people have selective memory anyway and if it was about "them" they would remember. As I said, it depends on how the relationship is going I guess. If they are good guys and genuinely forgot that's one thing but I would hope it wouldn't be a recurring issue. Something about this OPs guy though....

[DonnaK]

OP, he did give you something for your bday before he left, so that's saying something, right? Maybe he forgot your bday cause he's been busy being away doing his military duties. Hopefully he will remember a day or 2 later to a least say happy belated birthday.

[TablesandChairs]

I think the time apart, coupled with this being a relatively new relationship, is causing some insecurity to settle in. When he returns, simply tell him that you were kinda upset he forgot your birthday and that his relationship status is listed as single. Just be honest - not dramatic.

[TheEvilJester]

I'm a guy but I am a bit on the fence on this one. It would be different if he maybe just didn't get a chance to get online that day. But, I sort of lean towards thinking that is a legit reason to be upset. I mean, I wouldn't say it is a HUGE deal, especially as a first time offense, but it is still reason to be upset.

Though, I do agree with others that he at least did something for you FOR your birthday before leaving, so that counts for something. My recommendation would be to mention it to him, but not as a big deal. Just kind of a simple "Didn't you remember it was my birthday on...?" and just that. If you stay together and it repeats, then maybe make a bigger deal out of it. Hopefully it just honestly slipped his mind. That can happen, especially with guys. We can be pretty stupid about those things. That's why I always personally make a specific effort to remember the birthdays of important people to me. I know otherwise it is too easy to forget.