What makes a woman treat someone like this?

[devilz advocate]

Originally Posted by Tibult View Post
What is going on with her?
* lost respect or never had respect for you
*not compatible which can lead to the above

..

Maybe Lesa got it right. You're depending too much on her which is not good for you. Relationships should have this:
"give and take"
"understanding" to make your relationship work.

And also, as what i have observed, your tolerating your girl. Tolerating in a way that you just let her do it again, doing the "drama2" thing. Shes somehow taking advantage with you. Have pride sometimes!

[michzel creativ]

You will need to learn to talk honestly and openly with your partner about problems in the relationship, When they talk to you about issues, you must learn to really listen to what they’re saying.
Develop good communication skill.

Do you have a baby with her?Maybe she want's one that's why she's acting like that.

[Hollywood]

..

Maybe Lesa got it right. You're depending too much on her which is not good for you. Relationships should have this:
"give and take"
"understanding" to make your relationship work.

And also, as what i have observed, your tolerating your girl. Tolerating in a way that you just let her do it again, doing the "drama2" thing. Shes somehow taking advantage with you. Have pride sometimes!

Are you kidding me?!
This guy can't even get to spend time with her by asking. Women don't act like that when they want a family with a man. You're way off.

[Tibult]

I also see you're one of those people that prefer to put the blame on others, and get incredibly defensive when anything negative is said of themselves.

I only get defensive when someone becomes offensive. Some clearly have some egotistical urge to show their gonads on this message board and are looking for a fight. Since I am here to resolve problems not butt heads with egotists on the internet, further words from these particular grinding-axe sorts will be ignored after this response.

As far as failing to provide insight as to why she may act the way she does? Did you ever consider the idea, that maybe you're the reason she's negligent towards the relationship?

Yes, I have considered that, however according to her, she doesn't "deserve me" but only wants me in her life. As I said before, she seems fine when we are together but is completely cold and distant when we are apart. She repels me, grabs me back when I distance myself, and washes, rinses, repeats.

[Tibult]

Listen, you're depending on her too much. She's obviously emotionally handicapped. She's only bothered with you when she wants to be bothered with you. Ring the Alarm!!! That is your sign right there! Don't depend on her for you happiness hun. She can't handle it.

One thing I have noticed... when you put majority, most or all your time into someone it never works. A person can only tolerate but so much from another human being. You could give them everything they say and appear to want... it will never be enough babe. Trust me on this.

Nip this bud quick! Make yourself emotionally and physically unavailable to this woman. Repeatedly doing so, will set off the alarm, "Girl... I am not your toy." She knows you will always cooperate and come back. Stop going back. Even if you want to jump when she puts the trampoline in your presence... DONT.

Although I do not like the term "co-dependency", I do get your point. It just seems silly to me, that if you love someone you don't do these underhanded vile passive-aggressive things. I had that kind of relationship with my ex-wife, and hated it. No love, all power-struggle, with my only struggle wanting BOTH of us to compromise, while she wanted total control.

[Hollywood]

All the more reason why she is your EX wife.
Time to let the woman go and let her be.

[Tibult]

You will need to learn to talk honestly and openly with your partner about problems in the relationship, When they talk to you about issues, you must learn to really listen to what they’re saying.
Develop good communication skill.

Do you have a baby with her?Maybe she want's one that's why she's acting like that.

I have really tried to talk about all of this with her, but she never wants to really discuss anything anymore. I walked out on her once over all of this, but I am the idiot who came back hoping she would change. And yeah, she has mentioned her biological clock, and she prefers unprotected sex, but I am infertile. So perhaps she was trying to trap me at first, found out I couldn't produce a child and now isn't that interested anymore. I don't know... Part of what she wants me to do is to not be so over-analyzing and suspicious all the time after my own ex cheated on me, and the first impression I had in all this was being her "boy toy". I am no longer suspicious, but she won't open up anything but her legs and the occasional gift. This isn't my idea of love.

[misombra]

maybe she just wants to be free.

[Junket]

My first post wasn't offensive.

I simply wasn't going to butter you up before I stuck it to ya.

In any case, a lot of what I said in my posts is accurate if you compare it to your replies.

Also, any woman who says shit like "I don't deserve you", then proceeds to treat you like this, means that she thinks you're too nice for her tastes. Not only that, but women aren't frequent to be upfront about shit like that, they'd rather take the passive aggressive way, slowly sabotaging the relationship, waiting for you to make the move to break it off so it makes you look like the bad guy in the end. The infertile thing probably doesn't help either. You are sincerely wasting your time her.

[Yacker]

You need to stop this relationship. It is too late to gain your respect back with her. You needed to portray this the first time she was treating you crappy and either had ended it then or really stood up for yourself. It does kind of seem you don't respect yourself so you have morphed your thinking into this is an ok behavior for her to have and thus she is continuing to have it. Stand up for yourself more in the next relationship and let this one go.

[Charlie Boy II]

I had to laugh at that retard bit. Imagine your girlfriend spending most of her time calling you a "retard"? I don't know why, but that's really funny to me.

[Junket]

What the hell?

What's happened to this forum?

[Charlie Boy II]

what? ....

[Junket]

what? ....

Don't worry about it, you're cool.

[Charlie Boy II]

well that's a relief