Wishing Someone Smacked Me Six Months Ago: Update & Lessons Learned

[smackie9]

NO MORE LDRs! And no don't let their issues become your problem to deal with. Your relationships ended because of bad choices (choosing the wrong person to date, them having personal issues or circumstance, like dating in college....should have been banging lost of chicks then) and you don't know when to quit. Like I said make yourself a priority, not them. You need to have a expectation check list. If it is not being fulfilled...bail.

[ChrisMac]

Preaching to the choir, man, but absolutely agree. I'm past the white knight syndrome now, and god yes, my life's biggest regret is sticking with one girl all through school. Part of confidence is having the knowledge that you can move on and find someone better if something goes bad, and I didn't have that back then. With #2 I also committed too fast and should have known that depression wasn't something I wanted to manage. The recent one (#4) was just a terrible person, and I let a nice but vacation-based LDR turn into something that got away from me, when like you said I should have bailed at the first signed of "confused". Yes... my issue all along is not wanting to eject as soon as a flag is raised.

With #3, tho, I absolutely adored the girl and she me, but we both didn't have the resources needed to have one of us move overseas, though I know she could have been The One. That's different now. If I had another shot I'd marry the girl, but despite recently hearing from her briefly that her life is okay but gotten a bit too domestic, I'm back focused on just enjoying myself and NOT committing to anyone anytime soon. We'll see how it goes.