Did I say something wrong? No ORGASM

[basilandthyme]

I hear you Mojo. If I'm not going to get there, then I'm not going to get there. I'm not going to fake it because faking it is just a lie - but by the same token, I don't want him spending ages down there if nothing is gonna happen because it just gets boring. Is this what you're talking about? And yes, I too have said that I'm not going to get there.

I suggest you talk to him outside the bedroom and find a solution which suits you both.

[bekho]

Itsboring to spend quality time with the person u love?

Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk

[Starnique]

i vote definitely ruins the mood.

This. Don't fake it because if you do that, he'll assume he's found that spot and you may never get a real nut. Don't say you're not gonna cum. I can see how that would ruin the mood. Instead if it feels good just keep moaning like, uhnnn uhnnnnn, its feels gooood and all that good stuff. Eventually once you really get into it, you will cum. Just work with each other when you're doing it and put your mind to it. You'll feel that eruption sooner or later and then he'll really know you came. No faking that one....

[basilandthyme]

But what if it's just not happening? Is he supposed to rattle around down there for ages trying to get blood from a stone?

[Mattiemae]

I"m not a scientist or anything, but usually something happens down there! lol

[basilandthyme]

And this proves that different people have different reactions.

If I'm tired or distracted or otherwise not in the mood, nothing will make it happen. And I suspect I'm not the only girl in the world who experiences this.

[Mattiemae]

I agree you do have to be in the mood. If you're mad of course it don't work! Those are the times I've turned the other way, because who feels like it when your mad! lol

[Starnique]

If I'm tired or distracted or otherwise not in the mood, nothing will make it happen. And I suspect I'm not the only girl in the world who experiences this.

That's my point. Focus.

[Wakeup]

Hey guys!
When my boyfriend and I have sex, sometimes I tell him during the act,"I'm not gonna have an orgasm" or "Its all you baby, I'm not gonna come". He has taken offense to that and says it kills the mood. Is that true for most guys? Should I say anything or not?

Thanks for the advice

Since he told you that it kills the mood, why would you need to ask strangers on the internet if you should say anything or not. Obviously, as long as you're doing this particular guy... you say nothing cause it kills the mood. Why do you care what other guys think? If even one has told you it kills the mood then why would you take a chance on killing the mood with another one?

SMH

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But what if it's just not happening? Is he supposed to rattle around down there for ages trying to get blood from a stone?

Do your kegals, girlfriend and move so that he cums.

[basilandthyme]

Do your kegals, girlfriend and move so that he cums.

I'm talking about not reaching orgasm during foreplay. Is everyone else talking about not getting an orgasm during intercourse? The OP only said "sex" so I don't know what she meant.

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Since he told you that it kills the mood, why would you need to ask strangers on the internet if you should say anything or not. Obviously, as long as you're doing this particular guy... you say nothing cause it kills the mood. Why do you care what other guys think? If even one has told you it kills the mood then why would you take a chance on killing the mood with another one?
.

But what if he's one of those guys who will just keep at it till he sees a result? If she's sore and tired and he's still working away at it, I reckon it should be OK to tell him that it's not going to happen.

[KingZ]

Fortunately, if it is emotionally and more mentally healthy for him, yes!

It astounds me how consistently terrible your advice is.

[Wakeup]

But what if he's one of those guys who will just keep at it till he sees a result? If she's sore and tired and he's still working away at it, I reckon it should be OK to tell him that it's not going to happen.

I dunno, when I know its not going to happen I just have to move quickly and get him worked up so he can't hold it back any longer. However: There are some men that can't orgasm during intercourse very easily (psychological reasons or from desensitization from the way they've been masturbating their entire lives etc)... those types, I'd be letting know.

I'm talking about not reaching orgasm during foreplay.

If I'm not going to pop, say during oral then I don't need to tell him anything, I just need to ask him to enter me and more times then not, it happens then. No need to voice it at all if foreplay isn't getting me off. As long as I'm suitable aroused and lubricated that is.

I think there was a Sienfeld episode about "The Tap" where she's not going to pop and George gets "the tap" letting him know he's wasting his time...

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Fortunately, if it is emotionally and more mentally healthy for him, yes! If you tell someone enough times they don't perform well in just about any area of their life, they start believing they are a failure, or suck. So this is the thing when we concentrate on negative aspects and be blatant about every mistake, or every experience that is not 100% we can make people really believe that is truth. From what you are saying you have them sometimes and sometimes you don't. So really this is about where your mind and focus is at that particular moment. Not always about what he's doing. So of course telling him what you do, you're basically telling him he sucks, which may not even be the truth. lol If you can see my point. Figure out why you're not feeling it, versus placing the blame on him. So yes, fake it to you make it. lol

Seriously, do not encourage women to fake it. They will end up NEVER enjoying an orgasm with their partner if the guy thinks he's doing it right when he's not. There are ways to show a guy how to make you get there without bruising their ego.

That is the worse advice you could have given. Op DO NOT fake it.

[HeartIsAching]

So just fake it?!

NO. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.

Besides, we can usually tell.

[dickriculous]

because who feels like it when your mad! lol

Uhh...why not? Anger ****ing is a blast. Rage and eroticism can easily coexist as next door neighbors on an open minded block.

[smackie9]

If all else fails pull out the toy from the nightstand and use it during sex for extra intensity. You can get one for his gibblie bits too so both of you can spin out of control.