problem with Friend

[Rosebud]

I know that but and I agree but at the same point this will cause other problems as well. My bf and him have been friends for about 10 years now and they are real close and whenever the friends get togheter he will always be there. I won't want to not go with my bf to these things becasue of him being stupid. And not to mention what the ehck would I say to my bf if that really did happen ( telling him to get the hell away from me). I know my bf would jump on me for nott elling him in the first place and then he would say becasue I did that, I was hiding something from him. we have had that fight before so I know how it would turn out.

[Asip4u]

I know that but and I agree but at the same point this will cause other problems as well. My bf and him have been friends for about 10 years now and they are real close and whenever the friends get togheter he will always be there. I won't want to not go with my bf to these things becasue of him being stupid. And not to mention what the ehck would I say to my bf if that really did happen ( telling him to get the hell away from me). I know my bf would jump on me for nott elling him in the first place and then he would say becasue I did that, I was hiding something from him. we have had that fight before so I know how it would turn out.

Things like that will happen again and what you have to do is...Next time it happens, make sure that it's close to where you b/f is so he can see what kind of friend he has...That way he can't blame you for anything...I know i wouldn't want a friend like that. It's the best thing you can do. This guy most lilkely won't change.

[Rosebud]

yea I don't think he will either Asip, he's been like this for awhile... way before I knew him but I've heard all kinds of stories. I just hope that fi that time comes it would be close to my bf but I doubt that would ever happen. And I can see my bf taking as a joke as well too becasue they goof around a lot like that. grrrrrrr. Oh well I guess if that time comes and my bf feels that way then I'll just have to give him the boot for not trusting me in the first place....

[whaywardj]

Might want to re-read my earlier one. I edited it.

It's a matter of picking your poison, I'm afraid. Either you clear it up with him without enlarging the circle of stress to include others, or you go on putting up with it to avoid that, or you let the shit hit the fan as it will. IT'S NOT YOUR PROBLEM. He seems to be making it your problem, though.

[Rosebud]

ok Hayward I read that post again. Made some very good points and thank you for the story!

I think I am going to clear it up with him maybe even friday when he comes over if my bf isn't here. I just don't want him to think the more he pushes the issue the more I'm going to be susceptible to complying with him. So trust me I want to take care of this before anything else explodes my way!

[whaywardj]

Gad. Did you really HAVE to say "anything else explodes my way" while we're discussing someone wanting to have sex with you?

[Rosebud]

LOL... I was hoping you guys would miss that sentence! I didn't even put two and two together until after I posted the damn thing.... lol

[whaywardj]

Been my experience the regulars here don't miss too much. That's why I keep my eyes on my dress hem.

[Rosebud]

LOL! Well at least you were the one that caught it instead of like LLyod... that would have been horrible! I just don't know how I always get right in the middle of things when I don't even do anything in the first place.

[whaywardj]

Well, don't worry about Lloyd. Remember: He's always wrong.

[Rosebud]

Yes, Yes he is. Even still I should have seen that one coming.

[Rosebud]

OK all so I kinda forgot to update you guys on this..oops!!

Anywho he came by on friday after my bf had left for work. he was fine and was behaving himself so I just casually brought up everything to him and he said he couldn't help flirting with me becasue he cares so much for me and that he would stop doing it. Now I don't know if it's really going to stop but we'll see. I'm not worried about it anymore in any case.

[independent]

Glad it turned out like it did!

(big relief, eh?)

[Rosebud]

yea, so far so good. One less thing to worry about....

[indigosoul]

Been my experience the regulars here don't miss too much. That's why I keep my eyes on my dress hem.

Rosebud, I hope you won't take this the wrong way given my other responses in other threads, but don't you have enough drama going on right now in your life w/o worrying about this?

There are those who believe that, to a large extent, we set ourselves up for the events that occur in our lives...sometimes w/o our concious awareness.

Suggest you re-read that last advice post of Haywards. Esp. the last paragraph "PS". Theres a message in there you may be missing, I think. Try to read it while being mindful of what I just said above and think about how it might apply to your own situation. Try not to flinch if it becomes painful. Good luck.