Please help, just give me some input!!!

[searock]

searock, aren't you the limey who makes all those inappropriate posts?

Wow. You really need to start working on the whole thinking before writing thing. At least make sure you know what you're talking about before you post it. Besides, even if I were that "limey", it would be entirely irrelevant to the current discussion.

No one is forced to take any advice here. But you overlook the fact that many, many people who post threads show hostility to advice they don't like. All the things I've posted his girlfriend has said. Yet he's mad at me for it. I don't post just to seem right. But when I am in this case right, why should I apologize?

I haven't implied that you think that someone is forced to take any advice. I do not overlook that fact you say. Yes, many people do that. I just don't think the OP does it, at least not with your advice. I also don't think you were entirely right on his situation (no matter what you say), nor have I implied that you "should" apologize.
You do seem to make a lot of assumptions based on... what? Wait never mind, I don't really care.

Now back on topic, I hope .

[James Banes]

If you didn't care, you wouldn't have come back and edited your post. Everything I said his chick already stated.

[searock]

If you didn't care, you wouldn't have come back and edited your post. Everything I said his chick already stated.

I fail to see how my editing my post could possibly imply that I care about what you base your assumptions on. Ugh, fallacy logic, how I hate it. And I still don't think you were right on everything. We'll just agree to disagree. Cheers!

[James Banes]

Well, there's some dude with the same flag under their name so I thought it was you. So that would mean it's hypocritical for someone like that to call out my posts for being inappropriate. How come people have a problem with my posts but not mwahahaha?

And searock, you edited yout post three, four times, right? How could you say someone else should think before writing but you can't do it yourself? There's not fallacy logic here. You don't come back to a post you to edit something you don't care about.

The problem wasn't my posts. The problem was syrup got huffy with me when I spouted the truth. His chick corroborated everything I said. It's not my fault he's hostile toward the truth. If he keeps this up he'll be a regular poster on the Broken Hearts forum. Most people are on that forum simply because they are hostile toward the truth.

[searock]

Well, there's some dude with the same flag under their name so I thought it was you. So that would mean it's hypocritical for someone like that to call out my posts for being inappropriate.

Except that I didn't say that your posts are inappropriate, I just said I don't agree with some of what you wrote here. But even if I had claimed your posts were inappropriate, and even if my own posts were often inappropriate, this would have meant I was being hypocritical alright, but it still wouldn't have automatically implied that I was wrong about your posts. I'm just being nitty-picky here because I really don't like it when people make invalid inferences and state them as objective truths, or make assumptions out of nothing (for example, seeing the flag and immediately writing hey you must be that inappropriate limey, without even taking the time to check before posting half-accusations).

How come people have a problem with my posts but not mwahahaha?

How do you know "people" don't?

And searock, you edited yout post three, four times, right? How could you say someone else should think before writing but you can't do it yourself? There's not fallacy logic here. You don't come back to a post you to edit something you don't care about.

*sigh* more assumptions. I'll word it out clearly for you. I don't care about what you base your assumptions on. I do care on the other hand to be as precise and clear as I can in my posts, which is why I often edit them (this case included). This is actually because I often think even quite too much about what I write.

The problem wasn't my posts. The problem was syrup got huffy with me when I spouted the truth.

What you think is the truth.

His chick corroborated everything I said. It's not my fault he's hostile toward the truth. If he keeps this up he'll be a regular poster on the Broken Hearts forum. Most people are on that forum simply because they are hostile toward the truth.

You probably implied "in my opinion", or something along those lines, in those last statements.

This is probably getting really boring for the other posters, I suggest that if we intend to keep talking, we do so via private message.

[James Banes]

searock, I sent you a private message. Personally, I don't care if the other posters are bored by this convo. I just want to see when syrup is coming back. He's either been dumped by her by now or he's having a difficult time with her. Which is what I predicted.

[syrup]

She is actually on vacation for a week for a wedding she is in, so I have planned on giving her space unless she contacts me. And I rarely speak of my ex, and if I do it is quick and about a specific thing. And like I said she agreed to go out and talk when we have the time, lots of OT at work for vacations and weddings right now that we both had to pick up. And I do need to talk to her some more about how I feel, I was unable to get out what I needed to say do to the mood of our conversation. There are points I didn't get to bring up and points that she brought up that I had originally thought of.

[James Banes]

Serious question, syrup. Have you considered other women?

[Gal4Love]

Why even ask that James?

[syrup]

I think I'm spent, she is all over the place right now and I have no idea what she is doing or thinking. As of Saturday I have completely backed off and she has decided to act dumb and pretend she doesn't know why (she is now calling/texting me). Let's see what she does now, if this is it at least I am the one who ended it.


And thank you all for the help, too bad this seemed like it would really work out well for her and I. Guess when you think you know whats going on you get a reality check.


At least I tried, right?

[searock]

Yes, you did the right thing in letting her know how you feel. If she is interested, she will make the next move. Otherwise, if you feel like it, you can continue to be "just" good friends. Although if she continues to act as if nothing has happened for a long time (i.e. more than a week), then it's disrespectful, and just plain rude, of her. She should at least acknowledge your feelings, and be clear as to where she stands, if she intends to remain friends with you.

[syrup]

No, that's not it. I didn't really want to explain it because I don't want to paint her in a bad light. But you all deserve to hear it all, we are supposed to get together and "talk" about it. But she keeps coming up with excuses and it really feels like she is just stringing me along. And this doesn't make sense to me because she is very straight forward and truthful even if it's hurtful to everyone, so if she isn't interested or didn't want to hang out why wouldn't she just say it? And rather than being sweet to me she has begun to critique my work in a hurtful way because we do things differently (we both do our jobs right in a different way). But she says something hurtful and then will later kind of take it back but not fully. She has also become irritated with work and has been venting a lot, she recently said that she hates our company but likes people outside our department and that her vacation was so much better than being at work. I told her that her comments hurt since I was right there and that I picked a shift especially to be with her, she had NO response to this. I then asked if she hated me and she unemotionally said "no". I am just feeling really hurt, a month ago she always said I was great at my job and how we did things differently was a good thing because we are together so much and it helps balance things.

But she is also very protective of me at work when I am not using my protective equipment on jobs so I am just dumbfounded. She will tell me we will hang out but not attempt plan it, and she will say hurtful things but take them back in a way. What is going on????????? She is just not even acting like a friend, we really haven't been talking outside of work and she is just being blah to say the least. We get into "couple arguments" and it feels like I am in a relationship without any of the nice parts. She is just being very very different to me.

The last night we worked she was very hurtful and just went on and on all of our shift digging into me, I finally broke down and just closed myself off the last 45 min. I honestly was just so hurt by her I was on the verge of tears. She noticed I was upset and could most likely hear my voice cracking when I spoke, and asked if everything was ok (I said I was fine to avoid a fight, I didn't want to cry in front of her). Her demeanor completely changed and she became sweet and playful for the rest of her shift and just kept looking over at me while she was driving. When we returned to drop her off we switched and I said have a good night and she just kept looking at me even as I drove off to a job. I was upset then but the next day just became more angry and just decided I'm not going to keep this up, I have done nothing mean to her and have only shown her respect and admiration. She is now wondering why I am ignoring her texts and acting indifferent to her calls, I am answering all work related questions and issues in a proper way. I have just decided not to answer personal related inquiries that she makes. She knew I was upset but appears to now just want to act like it didn't happen, this is in in a nutshell and I have no idea what is going on and don't even see a friend in her right now.

[syrup]

We worked last night and she was grouchy and very snippy right away while in the company vehicle. After about half an hour I finally became sick of the way she was making me feel and when we were back at our work I got out and told her I was going to work alone tonight, she gave a snippy response as I was walking away. While still walking away she called out for me to come back, I did and she was confrontational asking what my problem was. I told her how she has been acting towards me since her birthday and how she made me feel the last time we worked. At first she denied knowing what I was talking about and didn't understand how she was coming off. After a short period of explaining she admitted she has "things" going on (she didn't explain) and that she realizes that she had been being selfish (not her words exactly but that's what it amounts to). She apologized and said she understood why I have been being distant and that she would think about how her actions and words will affect me. This conversation lasted about an hour or two between working, so it was more involved.

[searock]

Hm that's weird... What else did she say during the conversation? It seems like she might be expecting something from you, or like you let her down somehow, but clearly if she doesn't tell you what the problem is, how could you know...

[syrup]

I dont know how I could have I let her down, she did say she was mad that I always say we need to talk about things and that I tried to just walk away. But I told her she was making it impossible to talk to her because she was putting up her walls and pretty much ignoring me or getting mad at me when I tried to talk about things. She agreed that she puts up walls and was being selfish. I want her to tell me what is going on but she just won't, I think it's work, family, stress, etc.. She's working way too much and isn't getting the time she needs to relax.

I just don't know, she can't make plans with me but she goes apple picking (went on Sunday), went to a movie in the last couple of weeks, I don't know why she tells me theese things when she won't make any time for me. I am thinking she has some other guy and has me on the back burner just in case sometimes. She is being very confusing and I just don't know what is going on.