Long Distance and doesn't want a boyfriend. Womans perspective needed

[davz]

OK, I will try to keep this brief but that may be hard.

In October of 2012 we went away on an end of season soccer trip. I met a girl and we had a great time during the AFL grand final, just flirting and mucking around, nothing too heavy, When we left she took my sunnies and said she would give them back later, I took that as a good sign so I let her have them (cheap sunnies anyway so if I never saw them again its no biggie) So t 1am that night she texts saying, sorry dude I still have your sunnies, want me to give them back to you tomorrow, I of course say yes and we make plans to meet, so she shows up with her friend and stay around with us all day and then that night we had an amazing 1 night stand, and for intents and purposes that was all it was.

I liked it that much I suggested that we stay in touch and I might pop up to the gold coast 1 more time for some fun, she agrees and that is that.

Well long story short we text a lot and flirt heaps, and get to know each other over the next week then it turns into phone calls which is where it really starts to change. We start growing a real emotional bond with each other and since I met her I have spoken to her pretty much daily right up to now (mid feb 2013) She has been down to spend the weekend with me in November, I went up to spend a weekend with her in Feb and both times it was just so natural to be around each other. I know I like her but keep that hidden as well as I can and she is the same towards me, she has admitted to me that she likes me a lot more than she cares to admit.

The thing is, she is very adamant that she doesnt want a BF right now, and says things like timing is all wrong etc etc, she was hurt pretty bad by a guy recently and has a bad taste in her mouth still so to speak, she has also paid for a 7 week holiday to the USA and Europe in may this year which I would want to stay single for to, which gets me to my question.

Am I bashing my head against a brick wall if I choose to 'wait' for her to be ready? Should I tell her how I really feel for her and risk scaring her away?

I have seriously thousands more words I could type here on pertinent information regarding our situation so feel free to ask me anything to hep you get a better feel for my situation but I really wanted to keep the initial message brief.

[basilandthyme]

Yes, you are bashing your head against a brick wall. She's been very clear about not wanting a boyfriend and like it or not, you need to respect that. Her reasons are all sound, too. Telling her how you really feel would only make it more uncomfortable for both of you.

Also, it's fair to assume the long distance is an issue for her too. To be perfectly honest, I don't know why anyone would commit to a long distance thing - so even when she's over her ex and the O/S holiday is done, she still probably won't be interested.

Remember this as a great holiday romance - but that's all it was.

Sorry I can't be more positive for you.

[Boisdevie]

1. She said she doesn't want a boyfriend.
2. You don't even live anywhere near each other.

Call me dim but I just have this slight suspicion that it's not going to work.
Oh and Long Distance = Absolute shi.t.

[davz]

cheers, I do agree.

[ashley89]

she flat out said she doesn't want a relationship, why would you waste time pining after someone who isn't on the same page as you?