Try to give all for having him back?

[cast no shadow]

He's from the US, I'm not.
I started now a process of getting a two-years job in the US, where I can ask for a country to be station at (they can't promise though).

The reason I thought of applying is the hope of having him back. I can't stop thinking about him and imagine our life together.
At home I now started an internship for a year in order to get my professional diploma.
I don't like my work, but I guess a big (of not the only) part of it is the fact that I can't stop wanting to be with him again.
Going to the US means quitting my job, and not finishing the professional process I started.

We never talked about me moving to be with him. We were together for 6 month, and broke up when I left.
He kinda stop our connection, and the last time we mailed was a short one a month ago when he told me he won't come visit.
He didn't love me (obviously) as much as I love him, maybe because he knew it's a short-time relationship until I'll go back home.

Should I go for it? In the cost that he won't even want me back?
I don't know if it worth giving up the internship, cause even though I hate it, it's really in a good place.

I don't know what to do, and what I want.
I want him back mainly, but I think that deep inside I know it won't happen.
I thought to go and try to get accepted and than decide, but it's also drive me crazy.
Should I tell him? ask him if he see something between us? Or maybe wait to see?

[searock]

Obviously you should forget about him and focus on *your* goals. He doesn't want you, why should you humiliate yourself and sacrifice your career for him? It would be useless.

You shouldn't contact him, by the way. He broke off contact entirely over a month ago, and explicitly told you that he won't even come visit. Let it go. It gets better. :-)