Want my soulmate back

[jml1986]

My girlfriend of four months broke up with me last thursday telling me I was too possessive (Were both 24). ( I'm working on these issues now.) We had a big fight while on vacation. When we got back, she sent me a text saying she needed some time to think. During this time she wouldn't answer my phone calls. Two days later she sent me this via text: She said "I'm really sorry, baby, but we can't fix this, it is so hard to let you go but it is best for both of us. She also texted that she couldn't talk to me because hearing my voice would make her break down and that she didn't want me to call. I texted her back saying let us give it another go and I'll make her happy again. That was the last contact we had. We had a really special connection, i know she loves me, and there are things she told me that make me think there is hope. Even in her breakup text she said it was so hard to let me go. She recently told me she didn't know what she'd do without me if we weren't together, and that I was the only person she has ever thought of marrying, and that I'm her soulmate. What do I do now? I am not ready to give this up, just not sure what my next step should be. Should I refrain from contact, as she has requested. or do I show her that I will not give up without a fight. Any ideas of what I should do....wait a couple weeks to contact her? send her a letter pleading my case or maybe just call her in couple weeks and instead of pleading my case just ask how she is doing? We've been together almost 24/7 since we met so would it be better if I wait awhile before I contact her so she starts to miss me? Thanks for the input.

[flo_22]

I'm sorry to hear about your break-up. It's difficult and it hurts, it will do for a while. It sounds like you're still going through all the motions seeing as it only happened last week. I know it feels like this is the time to fix everything and that the longer you leave it, the harder it will become, but that's not the case. It's obvious you have strong feelings for this girl, and she seems to have them for you too, but it takes more than that for something to work. My ex told me that he loves me and all that but that he doesn't think it could work because he'd only end up hurting me, and while at the time, I was like you, thinking 'Well if he loves me then why's he letting me go?', I learnt that feelings, although obviously very significant, are not the only thing that makes a relationship work.

She sounds like she has some sort of doubt in her mind, which is making her think twice about rekindling, but that's her issue, not yours. I think you should go no contact for a while and respect her wishes. It'll help you and she'll respect you more if you respect her. Maybe this time apart might make her realise that she does want you back, or make you'll realise that you are actually doing okay without her. However it turns out, you'll gain more clarity from having time away from the situation, which is something that won't happen when you're caught in the mist of it all. Try and focus on other things for a while - work, study, friends etc. I know it's easier said than done, but I don't think there's any else you can do at this point. She knows how you feel and what you want, it's up to her now, and it has to be her own decision.
I hope you're okay, and try to be strong!

[Poetic_Partner]

There is no such thing as a soul-mate. Put that idea out of your mind and look at your situation from a fresh perspective.

Even if you want to believe in soul-mates, consider if it's someone else.

-PP

[YouAreBeautiful]

It sounds like this woman loves you but is a little scared of your intensity. It sounds like it's something that is a part of you and would be difficult to change. Tell her that you want to improve on this to make her feel comfortable and will do anything she suggests to help. And actually do it. it may feel impossible but over time we can change our traits a little bit.