dating friend's ex

[lastwish]

In a girl's realm, dating a friend's ex is taboo. But what about in a guy's perspective? If your very close friend dates your ex...would you be deeply offended?

[someonelse]

why would you want to? As I've always said relationships are hard enough w/o adding extra crap on top of it.

[enterprise]

Depends on the circumstances on the break-up. All in all I'd like to believe I would never do that and never plan to but people do stupid things.

[zoso]

I'm a girl, but it's not as taboo as you think it is. It's probably similar for both sexes. It depends on:

- how long ago you broke up with them
- how long you dated them
and
- how serious the relationship was

If you broke up with them, say, a year ago, then I don't really see anything wrong with a friend getting with them. A year is enough for you to move on, pretty much get over them, and start anew.
But, it may be a bit different depending on how serious the relationship was, if you still have feelings for them, and how long you dated them.
If a year ago I got out of a serious 5 year relationship, and still had mild feelings for the person, I don't know that I'd be totally ok with it if a friend started dating them.

[Cain]

To me it depends on how close the friend is. If it's a good friend, you ask him if he'd have a problem with it. The reason being that if me and him hang out a lot and I date his ex and they had bad history between them, then it'd be wrong of me to bring her around him.

[Mish]

In a girl's realm, dating a friend's ex is taboo. But what about in a guy's perspective? If your very close friend dates your ex...would you be deeply offended?

If a very close friend dates my ex then he's no longer a friend. How can you trust someone like that?

[1averagejoe]

This is very difficult to answer. I'll start off with if my best friend were to date my ex without telling me, I would be upset. Because he did it behind my back. But if he were to come to me and ask me, as much as I'd prefer that he not date her, I would say yes. Because as a friend I would have appreciated that he respected me enough to ask me before doing so.

Would things be different? Well, sadly yes. It would be hard to trust him, I'd wonder if he was telling her things I was telling him. I'd also feel awkward about the fact that he chose her over me as a friend. I wouldn't be mad though. I would be disappointed, but I would accept it and not show them that it bothered me.

Friend's ex's are off limits in my book. It just causes more problems and unnecessary drama.

[tooxshort]

In a girl's realm, dating a friend's ex is taboo. But what about in a guy's perspective? If your very close friend dates your ex...would you be deeply offended?

I don't think I'd be "deeply offended" ... I might be like "what an idiot" ...

There is an unwritten rule with the fellas about not dating each other's exes. Plus, then since you know the guy, you get into all that comparison bullshit. Staying away from friends' exes is a safer route ...

[Illusional]

i get over my ex's so anything is fine with me. in fact, i will meet this new bf because i tend to remain cool with my ex's, for the most part. oh in fact, this guy that i used to cruise with hooked up with a chick from my past. i told him how to get in good with her parents.

raverboy

[Tedel]

I know of men who never date a friend's ex, and know of men who don't mind at all.

[Illusional]

wow... so you know every single man on this planet huh?

i also know of menly men, and pussy whipped men. does that also cover all the grounds?

raverboy

[clearskies]

I do not see it offending to date your friend's EX, because she is his EX. What if he is a new relationship? that will make it much easier.. But anyway, I will not try to bring them together as that will not be nice to any of you.

[Illusional]

you don't see it offending because you're not keeping in mind that some relationships end very badly with one of both members resenting one another.

raverboy

[clearskies]

True, many relations - if not most of them- dont end amicably but resentment remains as you said. That is why, I do not want them to face each other (his gf and male friend). But letim decide what is more important for him? he may be put in a situation where he has to choose between friendship and relationship with his new gf (his friend's ex).

[Illusional]

now it sounds as though as if you are contradicting yourself.

raverboy