Hi everyone ,
I am having a problem that its getting me confused on what to do!
I have a girlfriend for 13 years and never but never went out or stayed with any other woman during that time,
10 years ago I moved to a different country and started working in a new job, in this new place I started working
I have meet a coworker girl and for her and for me was the immediate spark and attraction but we didn't ever
even talked about it, we knew it was there and we avoided situations that could lead to any possible relation like
going out or going to her place or being alone somewhere together...She knew I have a girlfriend so we avoided
this situations cause we knew that if we don't something would happen...
For the past 8 years I have been working with her every day, and the fire still is there and the situation remained like
that until 6 months ago, for the past 4 years also my girlfriend got promoted in her job and now spends a lot less time
at home since it is always traveling, I am alone 11 of the 12 moths of the year and we (me and GF) see each other maybe 40 days a year except on Christmas and new years eve that we are together...
going now back 6 moths ago when all of a sudden me and my Jobs friend started a relation based on sex, we spend lots of time together she says its what she needs cause she doesn't want any steady relationship and cause she is very attracted to me,
, we are doing our sex moments for 6 months and its like we are animals some times, in fact we are so well on this that she says to me its the best she had and I say the same, we connect in a different level that I thought it was gone on me ...but, now after this time she started talking about more time for her, we have an agreement that we would tell everything to each other and that if she wanted another guy ever or being with another guy she would tell me and I would give her life back and her space I was the one that told her that, cause its only fair and just from my side, but now she asks me her space, and I ask is there someone, and she always says no but she needs space, she tells me , that a guy that is the company doctor has been inviting her to go out, and if that happens if there is a problem with me, I ask if she likes the guy, she tell me no , we both know that the guy is always searching for sex only, and always wanted her for that she knows that and she knows that once he gets that will forget her, but still she asks me if it happens the sex with him if would be a problem for me....
...My first reaction was to ask why she wanted sex with another guy, if its not a relation that she wants with him and says that sex with me is so great why that with this guy?!
she says its just a question, that nothing like that is going to happen for now with no one cause she is great with the sex we have but still ask me for her own space...
I am getting distance, and told her that didn't understood the reason for sex with other guys, that I would understand if she ever wants a steady relationship with someone but that I do not understand the need for sex with other possible guys that can pop up in her life, and that if she wants that maybe its time to really go in different direction and give her all the space she needs , she says she doesn't want that, she doesn't want to loose what we have but still needs her space,I said that I could not feel easy with that situation of her sex life with casual guy and so if she needs the space it is time for a separation and end up this that we have together, that it is not fair for both of us, and that this way she could do what ever she wanted without any problems, she doesn't want that, she wants to keep the relation we have...in my view she wants all the parts of the cake
and just go for other cake when she wants knowing that she haves me (the cake) there for good sex and great time...
In resume she wants the sexual relation we have without commitment and at the same time if meets another guy and like him go to bed with him also and keep me for sex....so she asks me Free space...but experience has teaches me that when a woman asks for space is that know or have something going on with another guy and knows that something is about to happen between them...
Please give me some advise on this people,
should I move away and give her space
or what should I do...