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Thread: HELP! I over-analyze!!

  1. #1
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    May 2003
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    HELP! I over-analyze!!

    OK first off last year my personality started transforming, and I started becoming more out-going, confident, and also my looks have developed well in a short amount of time. Well this year, shyness is completely gone, and I have developed this Uber-outgoing personality that everyone LOVES!!! and I seem to have become MUCH better looking. Its crazy I have made about 3 dozen new CLOSE friends, and the girls have changed too. Whereas before I had huge lapses between girls liking me, I now have 4 girls I know like me, and a few I'm unsure about. Unfortunatly of those 4 girls I'm only interested in one of em, and luckily shes the one showing me the most attention, and she happens to be just my type: Smart, Funny, Not-wild, Outgoing, not to mention shes gorgeous and has a great body.

    But despite the REALLY obvious signs that she sends me, I can't help but feel she doesnt really like me at times. And it's like this with everyone I've ever been interested in, but I choose not to show it because girls dont like insecure guys .

    Any advice on how to get over this sense of insecurity I have?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
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    You say she's one of the girls that like you, yet at times you don't know if she does? Huh? If she likes you she likes you. Maybe she has a bad day here or there, or maybe other things influence the way she acts around you. Ultimatley it shouldn't change how she feels inside about you altogether.

    To get over your insecurity, don't let it bother you that much. Don't think about it all the time. Don't think that if you do this or say this or act this way that you could blow it or that you're not trying hard enough. Just go with the flow.

    Continue being the person you say you are, and pursue this girl. I bet you'll get her. Don't waste too much time.

  3. #3
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    Well she hasnt told me that she likes me, but she knows I like her, and continues to spend time with me, in fact she invited me to this party shes having on Saturday. I'm still insecure, but I've learned to not let myself get to deep into things too early. I guess I shouldnt worry about the insecurity as much, because when I'm in social situations, especially ones with girls I like, I never show it, and I never feel it until afterwards.

  4. #4
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    sounds like a test run. She likes you. I bet she is just trying to get to know you more. Have fun at the party! Realx and be yourself.
    "Remember always, that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    - - Eleanor Roosevelt
    " It's not who we are that holds us back, it's who we think we're not."
    - - Michael Nolan
    "...to love and lose, is better than not to love at all..." .... Lord, whats his name....
    " The world is big... I want to see all of it before it gets dark." -- John Muir

  5. #5
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    The party went great. Unfortunatly we didn't watch a movie as planned, so I didn't get to move in on her, . But a did notice a few things:

    When the party was over I realized I hadn't introduced myself to her mother, so before I left I told her I hadnt caught her name and I shook her hand, and as soon as she heard my named she went, Oh, Banky! and shot her daughter a look, whom in turn said "haha mom", in a nervous "shut up" kindof way.

    I saw her whispering to the only other girl there, so I went over for some recon using the fact that they were right by the chips as a ruse. I didn't hear my name but I heard the other girl say "He's pretty cute when you look at him" possibly about me, possibly not, but judging from the other guys there I would say its quite possibly me, unless they were talking about someone that wasnt even there.

    As soon as I got there she gave me the grand tour of the house, including her bedroom, very minor yes.

    She also shot me a few of looks during the party.

    The two of us are supposed to go to the mall today too. I would think if she does in fact know I like her (I'm pretty sure she does, unless her friends are holding back on her, which I doubt) then she wouldn't invite me to 2 different events with her in the same weekend, but I'm a schmuck so who knows, lol.

  6. #6
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    Oct 2003
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    Seems like she likes spening time with you. If she didn't like you and didn't WANT you to pursue her, she'd obviously back off and spend less time with you. She'd mysteriously "be busy" and not as available.

    So if she truly knows you like her (even if she doesn't), and she's willing to go here and there with you and invite you to hang out with her, my guess is she's just biding her time and each time hoping that you ask her out or make a move.

    "Oh man. Nothing happened at the party. Well, maybe he was shy to do something in front of all those people. Well I'll see him at the mall tomorrow so maybe . . . "

    Go for it. I'm not exactly sure on what your first move should be, maybe just try to hold her hand or hug her waist as you walk around. Give her a few pecks on the cheek if you haven't already. Or just ask her out, on an actual date, to dinner, to a cafe shop where you know they'll be playing music, to roller/ice skating, something like that maybe.

    Alexi

  7. #7
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    maybe just try to hold her hand or hug her waist as you walk around.
    LOL, actually to tell the truth, I have already done the hug her waist while we walk thing already. In fact it was the first time we really started to get to know each other. It was a few weeks ago, a bunch of friends and I were walking and this girl told me to walk with her so I went over, and my instinct is to do the hook the arm around the waist move, it just happens.

    Yeah also she sits with me whenever we have a substitute in our class and we end up walking to class together often. And Friday at school, my day when sour right after a lunch, so she gave me hug to make me feel better, and later on she asked me how I was doing because she said it wasnt a good thing when I dont feel good. The thing I think throws me off is how bashfull she can be. Yeah if we do end up going to the mall today, I'll try to hold her hand. It will be easier because her bro wont be there this time, and she apparently is extra bashful around guys she likes when her bro is around, or so my best friend says.

  8. #8
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    Oct 2003
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    Just go for it man. At this point, I don't think you can lose unless you actually TRY. And at this point, you'd have to try pretty hard it looks like.

  9. #9
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    May 2003
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    OK i don't follow

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