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Thread: Need some advise!

  1. #1
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    Need some advise!

    I met this guy only 2 months ago. He came to my house to do some service and he really liked me. He texted me every day, all day long. He would say good morning, have a good day, how much he misses me and so on. On average, I would receive an email/text every hour. We would meet up as much as we could, which would only be twice a week for about an hour. He would always tell me how much he missed me and how beautiful I was. He always would tell me how much he truly cared about me. And that he cared about me from day one. Well I messed everything up because of my insecurities BIG TIME! The last time we met up, we went further than we have ever gone. NOt sex, but almost. It was perfect. I didnt know that he ended up getting his cell phone cut for non-payment, so when I didnt hear back from him, I emailed 2 VERY nasty emails about how he used me and how I wasnt good enough for him. That he walked away because I didnt sleep with him and that he played with my heart. They were very, very hurtful. 2 days later when he got his cell back up, he wrote about how hurt he was that I could think of him this way and basically said goodbye I have emailed him a few times now expressing how much I am truly sorry and all I pretty much got back was that he does forgive me, but everything happens for a reason. He also said " I am sure our paths will cross again some day". I am so heartbroken, lost, and the guilt I feel for what I have done is just eating me up I cannot believe I let my insecurities get the better of me. I have lost a great man I just want to know, from a guy's perspective, if you think he will be back, and if anyone out there has gone through something similar? Yes it was only an 8 week relationship, but it was very special. For both of us.

  2. #2
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    He could only meet you twice a week for about an hour? I'll lay money that he has a girlfriend/wife and was wanting to boink you on the side.

    I think you dodged a bullet.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

  3. #3
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    Actually, he wanted to see me much more, but I kept cancelling on him due to my situation at home. I was just coming out of a 15 year relationship and did not have the freedom to do the things we wanted to do. He came into my life knowing my situation and knowing that I was very unhappy. He was helping me through the separation; step by step.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by kimmie2300 View Post
    Actually, he wanted to see me much more, but I kept cancelling on him due to my situation at home. I was just coming out of a 15 year relationship and did not have the freedom to do the things we wanted to do. He came into my life knowing my situation and knowing that I was very unhappy. He was helping me through the separation; step by step.
    Kimmie, it's really helpful if you tell the whole story at the beginning.

    In this case, it's unlikely you'll see him back. Not only are you insecure, but you're still tied to someone else. If you really care for him, let him go so that he can find someone who is in a position to have a proper relationship.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

  5. #5
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    You really don't have a clue do ya? I feel you are more invested than he ever was. I think his phone was cut for non payment is a load of BS. If it was there are other ways he could have contacted you especially if he was so into you, he wouldn't have let it slide for days to get a hold of you, you what I mean? I think the heat was on with his GF/wife so he shut it down for a few days. With you freaking out on him was making things too risky for him so he had to end it. You are pretty gullible.

    You are not ready for a man in your life....better to just get busy discovering who you are again.

  6. #6
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    Even IF he was telling the truth about his phone which i doubt-he could have emailed you instead. Its BS

    if your getting out of a 15year relationship then it would be a good idea to learn to be happy on your own first before getting with a new man-otherwise you will just settle for anyone coz your lonely..
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

  7. #7
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    Pay close attention:

    1 - he has a wife or girlfriend.
    2 - his phone wasn't shut-off
    3 - he got what he wanted, found out you're too high maintenance/chick psycho, and he's moved on to his next side dish

    You didn't lose any kind of "great guy". BUT, you need to know that guys that come on that strong, which is entirely fake, will poof just as quickly.

  8. #8
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    Thanks guys for your advice. Im pretty sure he didn't have a girlfriend. We talked all day long, every single day up until my emails of bashing him. I did try to call him 2 days later and his phone was disconnected. So that part I know was true. What we had felt so special, for both of us. But I guess there is only so much someone can take. I tried to explain why I wrote those emails and where I was coming from, not that that gave me any excuse to do that. I guess I have to be happy that I am at least forgiven. Maybe one day he will understand somewhat of why I reacted the way I did. The 15 year relationship I had just gotten out of was pretty toxic. I had been cheated on 3 times, and I am clearly not over that. That affected this new guy and I BIG time. He is right, however. Everything does happen for a reason. And part of me wonders that if he couldn't handle me at my best early on, what kind of relationship would we have should he ever do come back? I just hate this feeling. I know it sounds funny for only being 8 weeks in, but I have never felt this strong of a bond to anyone, especially this quickly.

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    Life is full of lessons, and I hope you have learned much about yourself and what you are not ready for.

  10. #10
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    Be on your own for awhile and heal. That is the best advice your ever gonna get.

    You need to be over your ex, over yohr trust issues and happy, confident enjoying life when you meet your next man so concentrate on that

    maybe consider counselling too. 15years is a long time to come out and face life alone again.
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

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