Originally Posted by
Rowen
I'd like to highlight this part right here. By being scared that you'll turn out like his exes, he's doing a dis-service to you because he's comparing you to them. To be honest, if he's going to do that, he's clearly not over anything that has happened in the past. Therefore, I think that you should break it off entirely with him. Waiting around for him is only going to be emotionally trying for you and complicate things should one of your other dates discover a deeper interest in you. Not to mention, if he understands that you're just waiting for him, that's not much motivation for him to actually conquer his fears. Instead, here's what you need to do:
Breakup with him, once and for all, BUT make sure you tell him that you truly care about him and that you're only doing this because it's best for both of you. Tell him that staying/waiting would only be emotionally trying for you, and it would mean that he's trying to get over his issues for the wrong reason. BUT MOST OF ALL, tell him that you WANT to be with him and that maybe one day, if he works out his issues, you two can try again. Nevertheless, in the meantime, after you do this, do not wait around anymore. Just go on dates and move on with your life. That way, if he doesn't come back, you've already prepared yourself to move on, and if he does, you would not have had to go through emotional turmoil by waiting around.
Otherwise, if you do wait around on him, I don't really see this working out. I know it's not what you want to hear, but it's my honest opinion.
Good luck, violet. :S