Lost a friend... I think

[topp]

Ok. So, basically, I have this good girl mate. I was really struggling to hold in my emotions for her. She has a bf and kind of me and another guy at uni sort of fight for her attention. After we spent abit of time with her, the bf decided that he didn't want her seeing us outside of uni. I questioned this and wanted an honest opinon on what she thought and if she will actually not see me and she got quite shitty at me and refused to txt me all of today until just before when I sent a txt pleading for a response and feedback on what I said and she txt back saying "Im sorry, i just need a break and want to focus on uni. k". So i'm just wondering if I back off for a bit, will I get my friend back? Cause I do really like spending time with her and hanging with her. I hope she will get over it.....

[Horseyguy]

She has a boyfriend and told you to basically bugger off. What do you think?

Just leave her alone, she's taken and she's told you to back off

[that one guy]

Never be the reason a couple breaks up. She has a boyfriend. If you valued your friendship with her at all, you wouldn't of tried to intervene. Keep your distance, allow her to make her own independent decisions and respect her choice to be more focused on where she is right now.

[MaidenMinx]

Back off and leave her alone and don't worry if it means you will 'get your friend back'.

You asking her for more info and if she was going to not hang out with you outside of Uni was just rude. She told you her bf was uncomfortable and you basically said I don't care what he thinks. You may not have used those words but you completely disrespected their relationship by questioning her further.

[topp]

Ok. Thanks for the advice. I know I stepped way out of line now and I guess I have to suffer the consequences. I said Hi as I passed her today but she wasn't her usual self. I know one of the main uni work is for a test on tues and we had planned for coffee for thurs so do I leave her alone till after her test tues, ask how it was and ask if she is still keen for coffee or do I just leave her completly alone and let make her own decision on if she wants to see me again?

[HeartIsAching]

I'm gonna guess that you should probably plan for not going for coffee.

[topp]

I'm gonna guess that you should probably plan for not going for coffee.

But do I ask or not even bother?

[MaidenMinx]

Don't bother. Give her the space she has requested.

[topp]

Don't bother. Give her the space she has requested.

Ok. It will be hard but I guess thats the best option at the moment. Thanks

[AmericanGirl]

I think it's best to just let her be for a bit. It would be wrong for her to put your friendship above her relationship. How would you feel if your gf was always hanging with a guy that obviously had more than friendship in mind? Get busy finding a new love interest and then maybe you can be "real" friends. university is a time to meet lots of new people and have fun. Don't pine over her. Get out there and have some fun!

[IndiReloaded]

Don't bother. Give her the space she has requested.

This^. Sorry but she made her choice. She was shitty to you b/c her BF is probably putting pressure on her. Maybe they will breakup someday and she will remember you being decent to her now. Meantime, find a new girl.

[topp]

This^. Sorry but she made her choice. She was shitty to you b/c her BF is probably putting pressure on her. Maybe they will breakup someday and she will remember you being decent to her now. Meantime, find a new girl.

Hmmm. But that's the thing, I wasn't being decent to her the other day. I mean, don't get me wrong, I see myself as one of the genuine "good guy" but for all the good I've done in the past, seems like it can be all forgotten in 1 day of being a dick. So i'm thinking of trying after her test when she is less stressed out to see if she wants to go coffee or something otherwise, I will respect her decision if she doesn't want to and let her forgive me over time

[Horseyguy]

Hope her boyfriend kicks the crap out of you.

What bit about back off didn't you get? She's already told you she doesn't want to see you and she has a boyfriend who isn't happy with her hanging out with you

**** I hate clingy, needy insecure arseholes that are hell bent on screwing up other peoples relationships because they can't get one of their own ... sheesh

Bottom line is if she valued your friendship that much she'd have told him how important you are to her and she wants you in her life. She didn't cos you're not... get it now?

[topp]

Hope her boyfriend kicks the crap out of you.

What bit about back off didn't you get? She's already told you she doesn't want to see you and she has a boyfriend who isn't happy with her hanging out with you

**** I hate clingy, needy insecure arseholes that are hell bent on screwing up other peoples relationships because they can't get one of their own ... sheesh

Bottom line is if she valued your friendship that much she'd have told him how important you are to her and she wants you in her life. She didn't cos you're not... get it now?

Whoa!!!! Settle down mate

[MaidenMinx]

Hmmm. But that's the thing, I wasn't being decent to her the other day. I mean, don't get me wrong, I see myself as one of the genuine "good guy" but for all the good I've done in the past, seems like it can be all forgotten in 1 day of being a dick. So i'm thinking of trying after her test when she is less stressed out to see if she wants to go coffee or something otherwise, I will respect her decision if she doesn't want to and let her forgive me over time

Dude, if you want to make her hate you (or as horseyguy suggested, have her bf kick the crap out of you) go against EVERYONES advice and invite her for that coffee. DO NOT TALK TO HER! She has made her position clear. Jesus! Seriously how clearer does it have to be? Or is it the fact that it is so clear to you you are looking straight through it?