Hi folks
I had a massive row with my parents recently for lots of reasons but I guess it all comes down to the fact that they hate my partner and soon to be husband (tomorrow) and the fact that I’m about to pop a sprog in a week. We’re excited about the baby, but my mother in particular has instigated a lot of hurt throughout this whole relationship and pregnancy. I’m so heavy and tired now and I’m bursting into tears every so often over the whole thing.
We made (what I thought was friends) but it turns out was fake friends on their part. They continue to insult me and my partner. He’s muslim and from Egypt and I guess it started out as concern from them and has developed into hateful behavior from them. I just don’t get it though how they can be so horrible after such a long time and they even make up lies denying that they said or did anything wrong without even questioning why the issue would be brought up in the first place. And they start telling these lies to all my extended family (but luckily a lot of them know what my father in particular is like) All the stuff is pretty minor but It adds up in the end and straw broke the camels back when I found during a casual conversation mom screaming down the phone at me over a difference of opinion about food! This was of course after a pretty tough weekend of listening to her say how much she hated her future grandchilds name and made fun of my partners family name (of which I was heartbroken and actually shocked into saying absolutely nothing to her about).
I had this longterm dream that we would all live close to each other and my kids would grow up with my parents and they would learn how to grow plants and food together with lots of fresh air and a less materialistic life and when my parents get old we would look after them. I now know (even though we’re technically ‘friends’ because I didn’t want any agro before and at the birth) that I need to make better plans. My partner is highly qualified and we are now applying to jobs outside of the county and our longterm plan is to move out of the country.
I’m heartbroken but honestly my parents are just nasty people and there is nothing I can do to change that. I suppose I just need a friend to share this with. My only consolation is that my inlaws are fantastic and so delighted with everything but obviously there is no way I’m moving to Egypt and my partner has at times expressed a desire to based on my parents behavior toward him, I don’t blame him but I’m not giving up my rights and he knows this. He’s well educated and understands why moving to Egypt as a foreigner would be a disaster for me. So we’re making plans to move to another European country instead.