Getting extremely depressed

[yonder101]

Hello, I've never posted here before therefore, I am quite new. I want to really just get something off of my chest. I'm not really sure what I am hoping to get out of this, but any feedback is greatly appreciated.
I am 24 years old, and my fiance is 25. I am deeply, and madly in love with her. She is everything to me, and I would do absolutely anything for her, no questions asked. I know she loves me more then anything as well. We have what most people would call a perfect relationship. We get along great, we tell each other everything. She is my best friend, and I am hers, no doubt about that. However, we only get intimate MAYBE once (sometimes twice) a month. It is seriously starting to drive me crazy. I told her about my problem. She knows it drives me crazy. She also thinks we should have ALOT more often. So, we are both on the same page about what the frequency of sex should consist of. But she says it's because I do not initiate sex. (Now I have never really been in a relationship. I've never really had a one night stand either. Most of the sex I've had has just happened. I never had to do any initiating or anything like that really.) I do try to initiate it, although I admit I do kind of suck at it. I have literally tried everything I can think of besides blatantly putting my hands down her pants where I would feel like I'm "forcing" her.
In my honest opinion, I am an ideal spouse. I do most of the cooking, she dusts the house, and vacuums. I do all of the dishes, I do ALOT of her homework (yes, she is in college and I do her work). I buy her flowers, I try to set up romantic evenings with just the two of us. It seems like her idea of an alone evening is her getting on Facebook, and/or watching some stupid shows (she has TONS of them that she watches religiously). I literally feel like I get ignored by her when we are alone. When I do try to initiate sex (which I do frequently), she is completely oblivious to my advances. Sometimes she will giggle, and ask if I am trying to seduce her, which totally ruins the mood for me, and I get embarrassed. I know she has a high sex drive because she watches porn and masturbates at night when I work. I work from 11pm to 7am, which in itself makes it difficult to have sex.
Like I said, I have talked to her about this, and she either get's defensive, or starts crying saying she is not good to my needs. Then I feel like I have to cheer her up, and tell her that I love her and she makes me the luckiest guy in the world (which I truly believe).
To top things off, she used to date my best friend before we got together. He wouldn't commit, so that's that story, but they had sex multiple times a day every time they would hang out. She has alot of sexual experience, threesomes, one night stands, and long term relationships. She was also married once before.
We want to have a child sometime next year, but I'm starting to feel like that would put an even bigger damper on things.
Is this normal? Am I just a guy who wants sex? I don't think I just want sex, I have went 2 years two different times without sex. Most women gross me out. Finally when I do find one who doesn't gross me out, and I'm as comfortable with her as I am with myself, there is practically no sex? I don't get it. I literally feel like I give her the world, and I get ignored when it comes to my needs.
I'm going crazy!!!!!!!! Help!!!!
Thanks.

[vashti]

When she asks if you are trying to seduce her, why don't you just say yes, and continue on with what you are doing?

I am kind of wondering how skilled you are as a lover, and whether or not you are giving her orgasms. Women generally like sex when their partners are good at it. (no offense)

[yonder101]

Thanks for the reply. I get embarrassed. That's why I don't say yes when she asks. Although I'm not as experienced as most, I know for a fact that she gets an orgasm. Not every time that's for sure, but a good number of times. I'm sure it would be closer to every time if we were to do it a little more. Plus, not to brag, and I know is somewhat irrelevant, but I have a 8.5 inch penis with a pretty good girth. I also know that most guys think they are better then they actually are. When I have sex, my number one goal is to please her.

[justcheckin]

you got about a 1" penis right now because you cant even get to use it haha.


but really man, you gotta take control of that situation. she is not going to just walk up to you with her pants off and say "ok you can **** me", you gotta get real. If shes says "are you trying to seduce me?" you say "yes I am, now come here" and you continue your subduction. What are you getting embarrassed about? Do you guys kiss a lot? or do you have very minimal physical contact? You need to take charge and let her know what you want instead of dancing around it like a lil kid. She will more then likley only go as far as you take her, which from the looks of it isnt very far at all. Who cares if you got a big penis... it aint nothin' without some balls!!!!!

[Agape]

"we only get intimate MAYBE once (sometimes twice) a month"
"When I do try to initiate sex (which I do frequently), she is completely oblivious to my advances. Sometimes she will giggle, and ask if I am trying to seduce her, which totally ruins the mood for me, and I get embarrassed."

--> um, you need to be a bit more proactive and less insecure - you could say 'yes' . . . also the first few times will probably be tough, but eventually it will be better

-

"I know she has a high sex drive because she watches porn and masturbates at night when I work."

That's okay . . .but make sure she's not using the porn and masturbation as a replacement for sex or for you

[WICKED THOUGHTS]

Tell her to effin stop masturbating so she can crave for u more. Cmon, maybe she likes ruff/bad boy stuff and like when the man (you) in charge. imo good luck, ya.

[all alone]

Just man up and give her the old twig and berries.. clearly she wants it, now give it to her.