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Thread: Very weird sex problem

  1. #1
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    Very weird sex problem

    Ok well here is my situation, me and my girl friend are deeply in love and are both virgins and we have talked about sex many times and have openly told each other that we both want each other to be our first. But up until this point she has wanted to wait a little bit longer to have sex and i have supported her the entire time and understand completely. But now she has been telling me when i get back from out of state we are going to have sex, because of me telling her in the past i felt a little bad about me turning 19 and still being a virgin. and i have spent several hours talking to her about it and have been refusing to let her have sex with because of that reason, and have explained it to her that i want her to be ready. But she is dead set on doing this for me and does not care about her feelings on wanting to wait. And she really wants to but she is not ready and wants to put her feelings aside for me. I have told her no over and over again but i am so confused because i don't want to be that type of guy and want to be patient for her cuz i love her. I just don't know what to do and am lost and could use some major help. she said she wants our love to grow and have that experience with me. but it just doesn't make sense that she is so determined to have sex but admits she is not ready?!?! Should i just continue to tell her no, or give in and have sex even tho she is not ready.

    Oh and she told me the most sweetest thing that i have ever heard ever which really added confusion to the whole situation. She said that i had to swear on my soul that i would be her first no matter what even if we were to break up that she wanted us to have sex before we did, no mater what situation.

  2. #2
    anachronistic's Avatar
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    aww

    don't pressure her or mention it anymore, and when the time comes, let her initiate whatever it is you guys haven't done yet.

  3. #3
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    Thats just it i am not pressuring her or mentioning it at all she just keeps telling me about it. and she just randomly starts talking about it. Its kinda the other way around lol

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by hound1092 View Post
    Thats just it i am not pressuring her or mentioning it at all she just keeps telling me about it. and she just randomly starts talking about it
    well she really wants to have sex with you and she's ready then.

  5. #5
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    thats what i am confused about she seems like she is ready but she has said she wasn't ready and that it doesn't mater to her she wants to put aside that feeling for me when i am not asking her too
    Last edited by hound1092; 30-06-07 at 12:42 PM.

  6. #6
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    and has she told you that or are you assuming that?

  7. #7
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    Im not quite sure what part you are talking about but she has told me that she wants to wait but she does not know why she does, and tells me she wants to have sex regardless of that cuz it means more to her to have sex than that feeling

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    if her true desire WAS to wait...then she probably still wants to wait. Probably not the SMARTEST thing to tell her you felt bad about turning 19 and still being a virgin. I think that just added pressure...I would probably wait a while .

    "In the future, everyone will be famous for 15 minutes..." -Andy Warhol

  9. #9
    anachronistic's Avatar
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    whatever you do, let her make the first move if/when it happens.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Steve2004 View Post
    if her true desire WAS to wait...then she probably still wants to wait. Probably not the SMARTEST thing to tell her you felt bad about turning 19 and still being a virgin. I think that just added pressure...I would probably wait a while .
    I know and i have brought that point up to her that she wanted to wait so we will wait but she just sais she doesn't care about that anymore and when we talked about the virginity thing was like 5 months ago and it wasn't even that big of a deal but i guess it was to her... and i compleetly regret even letting her know that.

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    Quote Originally Posted by hound1092 View Post
    I know and i have brought that point up to her that she wanted to wait so we will wait but she just sais she doesn't care about that anymore and when we talked about the virginity thing was like 5 months ago and it wasn't even that big of a deal but i guess it was to her... and i compleetly regret even letting her know that.
    **** it then. If she wants to jump into it, it's fine. From my girlish perspective...losing my virginity wasn't a big deal to me. so maybe she just realized it wasn't a big deal for her either.

    "In the future, everyone will be famous for 15 minutes..." -Andy Warhol

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by lilwing View Post
    whatever you do, let her make the first move if/when it happens.
    I dont want her to make the first move ever for those reasons, i want us to have sex out of pure love not cuz i was sad about something a long time ago

  13. #13
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    would that make me a complete ass hole if i let her have sex with me because she wants too for me?

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by hound1092 View Post
    I dont want her to make the first move ever for those reasons, i want us to have sex out of pure love not cuz i was sad about something a long time ago
    *smacks forehead* what the hell makes you think that she wants to bang you just because of that? i mean, you're assuming all this shit.

  15. #15
    anachronistic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hound1092 View Post
    would that make me a complete ass hole if i let her have sex with me because she wants too for me?
    sex takes atleast two people. if it took one, it'd be rape or masturbation. it's not your fault and you're not an asshole if she decides she wants to have sex with you/lies to you about it and goes through with it just to make you better.

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