I also would like to have a male perspective of my situation; I’ve loved Carlos for about 7 years. We have been intimate for close to 6 years, but in a secret relationship; I know that any woman deserves better, but since I do not know of any good, lasting relationship I’ve opted to continue loving Carlos (I’t’s not like I can just turn off the love switch). Carlos is single and lives with his mom and brother; he’s an extremely well liked, sociable and intelligent person.
We don’t argue and have a very civilized “relationship”, but I don’t have my needs met!
I, on the other hand do not share his social qualities, but am also an intelligent person with many interests in common with my loved one.
I don’t want to have a full time relationship because they usually don’t work, but would like to share some activities with only him!
My big problem with this relationship is that he doesn’t love me and we usually see each other once a week, at my place. He never invites me anywhere, but goes places with his long-time friends and this makes me jealous. Even though I try hard not to have childlike reactions, every once in a while it happens and he stops communicating with me, acting very hurt and offended! I usually e-mail him saying that he has time for everything and everyone except me!
In the past I’ve read that in order to make the other person react and fear losing their mate, one should act while still in love with the not too interested party. For this reason I’ve written a short verse where I sort of say “I’m about o give up on my love for you, spread your wings and go, free yourself from this obligation, be happy!”
Do you boys think that this type of thing will push him away even more (this is my fear) or is there any chance that he’ll fear loosing me?
A few weeks ago after inviting him out for supper, he sent me along e-mail almost making it sound as though I was being unreasonable, and that we’d do that when the right moment arrived…
I answered back politely, but after discussing it with my sister I sent an impulsive e-mail saying “Forget it! You don’t need to be so arrogant!”
Of course I feared another communication shutdown, but much to my surprise, he called the next morning in a soft sweet voice! I think he liked it!
Well boys, what do you think I should do, send or omit the “I’m about o give up on my love for you, spread your wings and go, free yourself from this obligation, be happy!”
Thanks a million!