Advice Needed

[Harlequin]

Hey Guys
Any advice here is welcome. My girlfriend of 6 months has had two bad relationships & did warn me when we got together that if she felt someone getting too close to her heart, she put up an emotional wall & pushed them away. She knew she did this but didn't know why or how to stop it. Well that wall is up but I have told her repeatedly that I love her & I'm not going anywhere. The problem is dealing with stuff in the meantime while we work together to bring the wall down. Examples..One day she loves me & I complete her world, the next she is not sure if she is in love or even what love is. She tells me that she enjoys the companionship aspect of a relationship but not the relationship aspect, then a couple of days later is full of kisses, hugs & lovemaking. She tells me that she is happier than she has ever been in her life, then tells me that her happiness has nothing to do with me as she is capable of providing her own happiness without a man. These are just a few examples. I am so deep in love with her that the good things are an amazing high but the bad things hurt me like hell. How can I make her realise that I love her totally & completely, she is never gonna push me away, i wanna help her bring down this wall & I am nothing like previous guys. I love her for the person she is & always will. Thanks

[Lite]

All you can do is be a steady presence in her life, and encourage her to look into why she feels the way she does. Suggest therapy, some self help books, anything really in a constructive manner that she can use as tools to help identify her problems and possibly how to address them.

All you can do is be patience and steady in your support and love, learn the triggers that cause her to clam up and how to work around/defuse them. Remind her (very kindly) that you are not those men, and that while you understand her emotions are not caused by you, that it is painful when she takes them out on you.

Good luck, but it will take time and she probably should get some sort of therapy.

[leahcim]

this girl has got 'heard it all before' in her head yes she loves you but she probably loved the blokes who hurt her an thet may haved loved her, so its not crazy to think it could happen again in her head. 1st of all all men are dicks we all **** up including myself all we can do is avoid been stupid and messing good things up. but its not telling her its showing her that counts. it obvious you care for this girl a lot but talking should help be totaly honest with each other and even if it doesnt go well its best in the long run as you will be happier and more compleate people. time wil tell with your situation things may take a while to improve but as long as your both dedicatied to making it work it wil be worth it.