Ok, I went her number. Need some help on what to do [One week until I see her to ask]

[thechampanon]

Ok, so there is this girl. She is on my indoor soccer team. I'm pretty interested in her, and I would like to get her number.

I need your guys' advice on successfully getting her number. I see her next Saturday at my indoor soccer practice. [Basically it is going to be a scrimmage against another team]

So her name is Laura. I was also thinking of talking to her best friend Liz, because I don't know anything about Laura. Problem is I am on a time crunch because during the practice I really won't have much time to talk. Maybe a few minutes before, and a few minutes after. No time really to make small talk. Maybe 5 lines back and forth of talking?

So, if I talked to Liz before I could see if Laura is interested in me at all and also see if Laura is single, etc.

The playing field is very level, because no one on the soccer team is friends with eachother. We are all great teammates, and Liz and Laura are very nice and talkative which makes things easier. We all like eachother. So, really the only thing Laura knows about me, is that I'm 2nd best on our soccer team.

She is also very good.

So, I want to know what to say, when, etc.

I know it is a lot of planning to just get her number, but I do not want to mess up.

Thank you!

[Lite]

Hi, I seem to have forgotten my phone number, could I have yours?

Seriously though, "Hi, I'd like to take out to dinner sometime and get to know you better. Would it be possible to get your phone number to call you and set up a date?"

Just be simple, direct, and honest about your intention. Going through her friend might be kind of cut, but being direct seems to work better in general.

[1averagejoe]

I wouldn't go through her friend because chances are she's going to realize you like her, go back to Laura and tell her. She may be flattered, but she also might think it's weird that you're talking to her friends and may come of as stalkerish and not having the balls to talk to her instead.

Stop making up excuses about not talking to her. So somehow you have time to talk to Liz, but not Laura? That makes no sense, don't waste your time talking to her friend and talk to her. I wouldn't jump straight into asking her out.

Introduce yourself to her, make small talk, then at the end when you two are leaving ask her what Lite mentioned. "I'd like to take out to dinner sometime and get to know you better. Would it be possible to get your phone number to call you and set up a date?" Make sure you use the word date so there's no confusion that you're going out as friends.

[doppelgaenger]

My advice is don't go through the friend. It's cute to some women, but wimpy to others. You're taking a risk in making yourself look pathetic.

The best thing to do is just start a good conversation with her. Give yourself a nice first impression, be polite, smile, and get her to talk about herself, and listen to her. It's not hard at all. The easiest way to get a girl to talk about herself is to get her to smile and laugh. The smiling and laughing is important because it shows they are interested and relate, and probably have something worth sharing.

Then when you're ready to cut to the chase and end the conversation, compliment her and tell her you'd like to hang out sometime. She'll probably give you her phone number then.

Then while you are hanging out, ask her casually if she is single. You want to lead the conversation in the direction of friends, relationships, dating and things like that, and THEN ask her. The reason why you use that kind of transition is because you might risk being too straightforward. Some girls like that and some girls don't. It's just the most reasonable way to get a date with a girl in my opinion. You'd have the best chance that way. In fact, you might play out asking her relationship status and asking her out on a date over a period of days.

Remember, it's not just about getting her phone number It's about getting her

[Cbrider]

I like the second best on the team line in there. I use to think like that too, in the end you could be the worst player on the team and still get a hook-up.

Relax and be direct.

[Indignant]

why phone number? it's so much easier to get a girl's e-mail address. take a couple of group pictures and then get everyone's e-mails to send them the pics. take it from there.

[1averagejoe]

why phone number? it's so much easier to get a girl's e-mail address. take a couple of group pictures and then get everyone's e-mails to send them the pics. take it from there.

Getting someone's e-mail as well as everyone elses email will just give her the idea that he just sees her as a friend.

Also asking someone out on a date/to hang out over the internet vs. over the phone or in person is conceived as being more impersonal and she may think of him as being to much of a wimp to talk to her in person/on the phone.

[thechampanon]

Getting someone's e-mail as well as everyone elses email will just give her the idea that he just sees her as a friend.

Also asking someone out on a date/to hang out over the internet vs. over the phone or in person is conceived as being more impersonal and she may think of him as being to much of a wimp to talk to her in person/on the phone.

Yeah, averagejoe, I would have to agree with just about every point you just made.

And doppel, I think I will do that then.

And im just saying that being second best on the team at least doesn't hurt. I was just showing how much of a clean slate I have. No high school rep., etc. since we go to diff. schools.

Also, the more opinions the better guys. I appreciate all your help.

[thechampanon]

Wahoo guys! I got it!

After the game, I just walked up to her and said
"Hey Laura, you played a good game today"
and she said something like (she's jking)
"You did too except for that goal you gave up! I'm mad at you!"

then I said (fumbling my words. )
"Well you know... I am... uhh... I'm just not good! I guess I suck!" (turned it into a joke)

she says "Ohh! You did great!"

then I asked if i could get her number and maybe we could talk sometime, etc.

and she gave me her number, and patted me on the back and said "bye jad" (my name)

I think it went alright.

So I am going to wait and text her Monday night, and call her to ask her on a date Wednesday for Friday.

But I am not sure what to say.

I was thinking for a first text I could say "Hey! Guess who : D"

[carl1222]

This is a perfect example of how we make something so simple to be soooo hard.

I hope things work out great between you, but if they don't and for future reference ... next time you want to call a girl, just say "Hey, I'd like to call you ... may I have your number?"

Isn't that much easier?

Carl.

[thechampanon]

Yeah, but back to what I was asking, what should I say when I text her, and when I call her?

Openings

[Zehx]

this annoys me but I've found that in this day and age you stick to texting at first. Just ask her what shes doing, its always better to start off the first date with a group rather than 1on1

[Cain]

Honestly, I'd avoid texting at the beginning. Just call her, let her know who it is, and ask her out for Friday. That's it. Don't talk to her a lot. Don't call her every day. Set the date up, end the phone call, and call her Thursday just to confirm that you're still on for Friday. The more you talk on the phone the less you'll have to talk about on the date.

[Everlovin]

This is a perfect example of how we make something so simple to be soooo hard.

That is exactly what I was thinking.

Champ, instead of asking her out, just talk to her when you call her. This will help take some pressure away because you won't be set on an outcome.

[thechampanon]

Well I think I'm going to chew the fat for just a little bit when I call her, then ask for the date. I know I am going to ask her out. If I don't then what is the point?

And also, I won't talk much with the texting. Just a little bit of flirting for the night. I'll be sure to end it quick, and at a convenient time.

And Zehx, I think group date is the perfect example of how to get friendzoned..

Am I right here?

Edit: Also, did her response, and what happened; did it seem like it went well?