My story

[tintin]

Last year I fell in love with a girl in my class,we got along really well,and we spoke and played everyday,it really looked like she liked me.Every friend of me said he thought she liked me,I agreed with their opinion,so I decided to try kissing her and tell her how I felt about her,hoping for a positive answer.One day I decided to finally ter her what I felt,a friday after classes,I got to speak with her in private near the school gate,I told her how I felt,first she thought I was joking.Was it that ridiculous ?. Then she said "ok...ok.." and my friend pulled me to leave,he was in apparently in a hurry. The next monday everything was looking normal,untill she decided to come talk to me to ask me again if what I said friday was true,I confirmed it and she said the,I guess,usual story: "I don't like you the same way,I hope we can still be friends.". I also hoped we couldd be friends but it was just a dream,things looked so tense,we barely looked at eachother,and everytime i tried to speak as a friend it got really awkward and we ended up in a wierd silence.
Two weeks later we had school exams,I failed miserably at bouth,I just couldn't study with it on my mind. The vacations came, they weren't really happy but they finally passed. Once again I hoped we would be friends in the new school year,wrong again. We were in different classes and now she also attemped to talk to me as a friend,we were allright for a couple of days,but I guess she realized I still liked her and the awkwardness came back. So far I have tried to even be her friend but she just avoids me,no matter what I try to do she avoids not to be with me,and it hurts me really bad to have to lose a good friend beacause of my feelings,she was my first real love,and I wish it could be at least a decent memory,but she keeps on avoiding me,I tried to tell her I didn't like her anymore,but no results. Could anyone tell me what to do?
I tried to move on,but other girl don't seem atractive to be honest,they repulse me and I always pick up any kind of bad quality in them.

I know there are other people out there,and I am still young,but still....

Sorry about my english.

Thanks in advance!

[Yggdrasil]

Stop living in an imaginary world.

She's purposely avoiding contact with you because she doesn't love you and she doesn't want to give you the wrong impression.

For a relation it takes 2.

You can keep on living in your immagination, or you can find peace with reality and accept that she doesn't feel anything for you.

Other girls don't live up to your expectations because you are idealizing her in your mind. You also are so afraid after this to be rejected again by another girl, that you find flaws in them. Thus, you're setting yourself up for failure.

Reality check: NOBODY is perfect. They all have flaws, even the one you're idealizing.

In the real world, people move on and get over their fear of rejection.

Let's look at this in a simple way:

In order to get one date, you have to at least ask 10 girls. Of those 10, 6 will tell you flatout they aren't interested. 3 of them will give you the friends bullshit and 1 may be interested. It's very unlikely you'll spend the rest of your life with this one person. So you'll do the same thing again. You'll ask 10 girls if they are interested in you, and the same thing happens again.

The simple math behind this is: you have to ask at least 100 girls in order to get 10 potential candidates.

So.. get busy. The more you ask girls out, the more you overcome your fear for rejection and the more confident you become. At the same time you increase your chances of finding a girlfriend. It's not rocket science.

It's like learning how to walk. It's not because the first time you tried to walk and fell on your face, that you gave up. Isn't that so now?

So.. why give up now? Because you got rejected by one girl? Pfft.. big deal. Look around you. How many girls are there? More than one. Plenty of fish in the sea. Go fish.

[tintin]

Uh,you make me sound like a rapist. I simply want to be her friend.

[Yggdrasil]

Uh,you make me sound like a rapist. I simply want to be her friend.

1. The rapist thing is in your mind.

2. You can't be 'friends' with someone you have the hots for.

What I am telling you is to get real, stop wanting something you can't have, stop rejecting other possibilities and get busy dating.

I suggest your read my post all over again.

[WantsItToWork]

thats not your first real love man, its simply a crush and youll realize how silly this whole situation is 6 months down the road.

[tintin]

My minds just keeps telling me its not over yet... But I am trying to follow your advice,thank you