Is it worth the fight?

[ruby]

When I met my husband I knew pretty soon that he was the one. We had an intense start to our relationship spending every night together and moving in together 3 months later. A little over a year and a half after we met we got married and it was bliss.

So the problem: I noticed my husband behaving strangely in the weeks leading upto our break up. Not being as affectionate as he usually is and there was something in the air, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. It came to a head one night after we had been out for the evening, he was acting weird with me and when we got home I pressed him to talk to me and tell me what was up. In a nutshell he said he hadn’t been happy for the past year (news to me) and that he believed our relationship was reason for it. I took onboard all that he said and asked how we should tackle this problem. He then went on to say that he didn’t think he could work on it. I was completely dumbstruck.

He moved out the following week and went on a four week holiday. I was supposed to join him half way into it but he asked me not to come. Now I haven’t seen him for six weeks. I spoke to him once after he got back (I went on a holiday of my own too). I was pleasant and cheerful to him on the phone. He sounded more like his old self before this whole unpleasant situation.

My problem is I still love him and despite the way he’s treated me, I still want him back. However I want him to want me back, not for me to go him begging him to take me back. I’ll probably see him for the first time since the break up next week. I intend to act cheerful and tell him that I just want to be friend. Any advice?

We’re both 28.

[Gigabitch]

The advice I have for you is to come to terms with the fact that this man LEFT you. You can love him all you want, but wanting him back is self-destructive. You're in denial because this really sucks and it's going to be hard to deal with, but deal with it YOU MUST.

[Bumble_bee]

Giga is right. Marriage is about working things out, and he didn't keep the 'for better or worse' end of the bargain up.

You shouldn't have to fight for HIM you deserve someone who will fight for YOU and your marriage/relationship.