asked out by co-worker... but I have a bf

[girl68]

Pretty typical.

This dude I worked with asked me to join him and a few co-workers for the typical "after work Friday beer" I declined that week. I said next time, I'm down!

So today he goes, when we going for a beer, I haven't forgotten! I said next time, I'm in! So he just sent an email saying: "Up for a drink after work on Friday?" Thinking this was the usual "after work Friday beer" with him AND a few co-workers, I said Yeah, sure!

Then he responds with: Did you want to stay in Richmond? Where do you live?

So then I thought, my it's sounding more and more like a "date" and it will only be just the two of us. I ask our mutual co-worker who is his friend and she said yeah, he's probably interested you're his type. I'm like shit. He's cool and all but I don't want him thinking I'm accepting this as a "date" nor thinking I'm available/ interested. She suggest I drop a bf line. So I respond with: "I can't get too wasted, the bf and I have a hockey game to play later!"

He says that's cool, he's also got a "date" later too.

So I've accepted, and he's learned I'm not single... Now is saying (to my bf) I'm out for a beer with some co-workers okay, or must I specify that there will only be one co-worker, and that co-worker is male?

Thoughts, please!

[AmyWright]

you could ask this guy if he'd mind if your bf came along too? See how he reacts.

[Primo]

I would suggest telling him exactly how you would want to be told if he was meeting another girl for a drink on a Friday night. Co-workers which is a lie, or female co-worker which is the truth.

[davidtorres]

So I've accepted, and he's learned I'm not single... Now is saying (to my bf) I'm out for a beer with some co-workers okay, or must I specify that there will only be one co-worker, and that co-worker is male?

why cant u tell your bf the truth/everything?

hmm why do you need to ask us this question? This is pretty common sense. You should know the answer by now but I guess you want to hear it from other people. No wonder relationship ends.

Why cant you just tell your bf that your having a beer with a co worker guy that likes you? Why do you need to ask us if its ok NOT to tell everything? its like your helping your co worker to make a move on you.


Seriously, your co worker saying that he also has a date later too is BS. Why would you want to drink beer with an opposite sex if your not interested? He just said that coz you pulled the bf card on him. Guys dont just do that. Even your other co worker knows that he likes you.

[Cbrider]

I would explain it just how you did here. Without your back story it will leave gray areas in bad places.

If you pitched this at me without the details of how it came about we would be having a less than enjoyable talk.

[girl68]

its like your helping your co worker to make a move on you.


Seriously, your co worker saying that he also has a date later too is BS. Why would you want to drink beer with an opposite sex if your not interested? He just said that coz you pulled the bf card on him. Even your other co worker knows that he likes you.

Oh god please. I'm helping him make a move on me by explicity stating I have a bf. U huh. You might think all men are bastards, but many are not. And even if he does be a dipshit and ignores my status you think I'm just going to sit there and indulge? Please.

And I don't really give a shit if he's got a date later. Perhaps he did try to save face, I would too- I'm I'm not a guy. And you should know that my co-worker also said they guy dates randoms as of now; so you're little theroy could be true, but it might not be. He's on POS and uses it frequently.

"likes me" and a mild interest to get to know me, followed by getting shot down with the bf line are pretty different.

See now the other 2 have put in good comments- you however just decided to assume all sorts of shit.

Never heard of having a drink with a friend :S Maybe where you're from... but that shit happens here all the time, and it's often harmless.

[loudrims_inc]

this guy wants more then a "drink"...u shouldnt go out with this scum bag!

you could ask this guy if he'd mind if your bf came along too? See how he reacts.

^thats a good suggestion too!

[girl68]

this guy wants more then a "drink"...u shouldnt go out with this scum bag!

And you know this becasue you're such a great judge of character!? He's been nothing but absolutely polite and friendly and even IF he wants something, what's he gonna get? A slap across the face should he even try, that's what.

[davidtorres]

Why do you need to ask yourself this?

Now is saying (to my bf) I'm out for a beer with some co-workers okay, or must I specify that there will only be one co-worker, and that co-worker is male?

Why cant you tell your bf the truth?

[girl68]

you could ask this guy if he'd mind if your bf came along too? See how he reacts.

How who reacts, the bf or the dude?

[loudrims_inc]

And you know this becasue you're such a great judge of character!? He's been nothing but absolutely polite and friendly and even IF he wants something, what's he gonna get? A slap across the face should he even try, that's what.

yepp...actually i very much am...

[loudrims_inc]

How who reacts, the bf or the dude?

see how the "dude" reacts

[girl68]

Why cant you tell your bf the truth?

It is the truth. Co-worker(s). There very well could be others who show up. The word is out: Friday beer @ __________.

[girl68]

yepp...actually i very much am...

Uhh okay. Thanks for your input judging a guy you've never met.

And, I'm not going to ask the dude if my bf can come. I'm not down with dragging partners to things they shouldn't be dragged to. I'd think it was weird if anyone from Friday after work beers brought their partner. IMO.

[Primo]

To be fair to the others who posted girl68, you DO know the other guy is interested in you and you're indulging it. You can be a good girl though, we know that :-) But hey, it is what it is.