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Thread: whats happening? have I handled this right?

  1. #1
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    whats happening? have I handled this right?

    Me and ex broke up 2 weeks ago. He wasnt over his ex. Initially he didnt want to, said he was wanting to get over her. But I felt he should have some time to get over her cos being with me whilst dealing with his feelings for her was starting to make him confused and miserable. Didnt end badly and he knows I want to be with him in time.

    1st week: still text etc. Turns up at my house (friday night) Im on my way out with friends. Asks to talk, saying Im right for him etc etc. comes out with me. One thing leads to another. Next day, I could tell he was still confused, said he wants to be with me but doesnt know. I told him I dont think he should contact me til he does know. Giving me false hope.

    2nd week: no contact til friday (again) - asks if Im out at usual place cos he'll be there with friends and he doesnt want to ruin my night. Reply back saying no somewhere else, dont be silly he wouldnt, have fun.
    Then 3am, texts loads asking where i am, do i want to meet, he wants to talk etc. Then calls loads. He tells me he's confused and depressed, that this week has been hell for him. He asked could we talk later, I said yes. (also his friend told me he tried to drop his phone in a puddle. when I asked him, he said he did it cos he didnt want to ring her (his ex), i asked if he had spoken to her, he said no)

    Next day: text from him apologising, told . He replies saying he doesnt know and that he is at his friends safe and hungover. Thats the last Ive heard from him.

    Have I handled things right? What should I do now?
    Any perspective would be great. Thank you

  2. #2
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    girl68 is offline little person, big mouth
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    Stop talking to him until he isn't confused anymore! How hard is that?

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    Jeez.. it seems like he's doing more to drag you through the mud while you're apart, than when you two were together.
    The secret of success is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake those, you've got it made. - Groucho Marx

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    Think you've handled it all quite well considering.

    It's time to start true no contact though. Tough times ahead...
    Quote Originally Posted by qwerty123 View Post
    jeez i turn every argument round on a man, why take the blame if hes stupid enough to let you blame him about something totally different

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    Yeah so far you've been doing pretty good for yourself. Don't contact him again unless he's really sure he's not confused anymore.
    To reminisce won't bring you back, just look ahead and hold on tight.

  6. #6
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    Booty call

    Sounds like this guy gets drunk, lonely, and horny then starts looking for you. Until he's over his ex and starts seeing you as more than just a safe port in the storm, ignore him. Actually, ignore him no matter what he says because he doesn't have the decency or respect for you to make a real decision regarding his ex. Go find someone who's into you not just into the "comfort" you can provide during his "stressful" times.

  7. #7
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    Give him his space to understand what position he is in. if he's confused- other people's actions can confuse him even more. so just give him his space.

    Stop having sex with him if he's your ex. (I'm guessing judging by your "One thing leads to another.") If he's not over his ex, then theres nothing you can do. like i said just give him some space to work out what he wants in life. If you're part of his equation- good for you. if not, then you know this man is not for you.

    Good luck. ^^

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