Do I owe my ex an explanation for not talking to him?

[MissAnn]

So.....long story I will attempt to make short. I was with my ex-boyfriend for about a year an a half. During that time I broke up with him twice. Both time had to do with his inability to cut contact with his ex-girlfriend. They were "friends", and according to him he had broken up with her because the sex was bad/nonexistent. However, he still spent time with her, helped her out with home improvement projects, and spoke to her on the phone at least once a week. I met her and she was rude to me, and clearly still had feelings for him.

During our second break up we didn't talk for about a month. I dated and slept with someone during that time....he claimed he did not initially, but eventually the truth trickled out little by little. He had slept with his ex-girlfriend at least once, as well as three other women who were friends of friends.

I became angry that he lied to me and felt that I was not getting the whole picture of him and the ex, and even it he was telling the truth I felt it was cruel of him to string her along. Unfortunately, I broke up with him while REALLY drunk.....after a wedding when we were at a hotel room out of town. I called a friend (who is a former ex-boyfriend) to come pick me up...which really make me look like a psycho hypocrite.

Anyway.....a couple of weeks after the break up he contacted me and said he had some questions about our relationship that were not resolved because I broke up with him in a drunken rage. I called him and answered his questions truthfully, apologized for my horrible behavior, and wished him well.

Since then he keeps calling and texting. They are just friendly texts, asking how I am doing, telling me info about his life, etc. His voice mails are chipper and nice..... I have not responded. He has probably contacted me 7 or 8 times now without getting any response.

My question is......is this rude of me? Should I tell him I don't want to talk to him? And..should I be a little creeped out that he is still contacting me? I have moved on and don't really think of him. It has been over a month. Shouldn't he be doing the same?

[sookie6]

Anyway.....a couple of weeks after the break up he contacted me and said he had some questions about our relationship that were not resolved because I broke up with him in a drunken rage. I called him and answered his questions truthfully, apologized for my horrible behavior, and wished him well.

This here seems to be your closure conversation...if there is still something that is bothering him then ask him what it is on the phone and decide then if it is worth seeing him again to clear the issue.

Other than that his obvious refusal to let go could potentially hurt you if you have decided and realised that you are happier without him.

I have to say his holding on to his ex gfriend during the relationship was extremely unhealthy. It is very uncommon to be able to patch things up when things have never been blissful in the past.

I would just move on.

x

[LailaK]

You don't owe him anything. He is your ex. He has a history of stringing girls along. Don't fall into that trap.

Food for thought: Is this how he acted with his ex before you? Is that why she can't let go?

Move on.

[MissAnn]

Thanks-I feel the same way, am much happier without him, and have no inclination to talk to him. I was just feeling bad because a mutual friend of ours said that he isn't doing well and I was being mean.

I don't think I am though, I DO think he acted the same way with his prior ex, and I have no desire to be the jealously card in his next relationship.

[lastwish]

He's contacting you like nothing happened because this is his way of stringing girls along.