Its been 2 years...

[biggrthanbiggie]

Ok so alot of time has passed since I seperated from my ex-wife. I understand why she left. I wrote this letter to her while she was in boot camp for the army. To her it was insulting. I did not mean for it to be but it is what it is. Even before that I really didnt give a shit as to what I looked like, I was definitly becoming a loser. Looking back now I feel embarrased. Anyway so she got out of boot camp and tells me "Im not sure I love you anymore." So I panic and for the next 5 months I did everything wrong. You know txting her calling often drunk txting etc....Finally my dumbass stops contacting her unless its a legit reason. We have a at the time 1 year old son together. She hated me. I had done alot of dumb shit to her. When Christmas came around though it seemed like she didnt want me to leave her moms house. After that we met up again for her sisters daughters birthday. Again it seemed as though she didnt want me to leave. After that me and my son saw her every other month. She lived 3 hours away. Well I began doing well forgetting her and we got our divorce finalized in october. The judge ordered me to email her once a month on our sons progress. She was to deploy to Iraq in November. The emails started good then began to become more friendlier. About 3 weeks ago she begins asking me how im doing. In a later email she invited me to lunch when she was back in town which was last saturday. We had fun but her sister was there so I felt uneasy. She asks alot about if I have plans like today. We visited for about an hour. We dont have that animosity between us anymore. When I was leaving I asked her if she wanted to go get something to eat. She said yeah. The night never happened but there was a legit reason. So im confused. I have no idea of wether she still has interest or not. I also need to apologize for being an idiot in the begining. What should I do? and dont tell me move on. I know I should but I want to hear suggestions as to how I move forward with her. If it blows up atleast I tried. No harm no foul. I just gotta know what if?

[vashti]

I think it is always best for children if their parents remain married unless there is substance abuse problems or violence involved. If you can manage to make things work with her, then do it. Ask her if you two can try again. What do you have to lose?

[biggrthanbiggie]

I agree completly with you. I was raised with divorced parents so I know the hardships. I used to ask her constantly for a second chance. I stopped doing that about 6 months after we seperated. Ive done quite a bit of changing and maturing since then. Being a single father can do that. Im afraid the straight up aproach may make me seem.....desperate or weak. I dont have anything to lose your right, I just dont wanna lose out if all it takes is just a little more time. Im not sure how much longer she will be in the states but she deploys back to Iraq again until June for a week. If I have the chance should I ask before she leaves or wait til June?

[cmacattack1]

Take it slow, see where it goes. You are sorry for being an idiot before but notice that when you aren't apologizing is when she is finding you attractive again. Don't ruin it with more apologies. If she didn't want to be with you, if she didn't want to forgive you, if she didn't think she sees something inside of you that is worth keeping around, she wouldn't be talking to you at all. Or at the very least, minimal contact that involved only the child and would be straight business. No dinners or anything like that.

[biggrthanbiggie]

This sucks y cant this just be easy lol. Alright I will just wait it all out, improve even more on myself and wait til she comes back for that week in June to make a move. Thanks